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baby bachler bad bad predikts bad thangs happen bak ban, banned bank bargain bath be bed beach beleev
bell best beware bi big bimbo bird birth bite biz bizee blame blind blood
bloopers blue book bore born boy braen breef brother bumper stikker burokrat byutee
160. b4...
      1. b4 yu borro munee from a freend, deside wich yu need more (Joe More)
      2. b4 yu find a handsum prins, yu gotta kis a lotta frogs
      3. b4 yu kontradikt an old man, tri tu understand him (Jorj Santayana)
      4. b4 yu kritisize sumwon, walk a mile in his shues
            that wae if him get mad, yu hav a mile hed start & him barefoot.
      5. b4 yu point out others sin, look at self (Ben Franklin)
      6. b4 yu want sumthang, konsider how happy R em hu hav it (Fransis Rochefaukald, 1650)
      7. b4 yu wed keep both ies open, after...keep 1 ie shut
        b.... after...keep 1 ie half shut (Ben Franklin)

160. baby...
      1. 1 baby tern 2 adults intu idiots (Jorj Kortline)
      2. babees leek at both ends (Dug Feever)
      3. babees R alwaes more trubel than yu spekt (Charles Osgood)
      4. babees R never bad (Luisa mae Alkot)
      5. baby...loud nois at 1 end, no responsability at the other
      6. baby boy=skrape on nee, mud on faes, bug in hand
      7. baby dont hav haer
         old mens hed just as bare
         tween kradel & grave...haerkut & shave (Sam Hoffenstein)
      8. baby fill emptee spot in hart yu didnt no yu had
      9. baby is a blank chek made out tu mankind (Barb Seinfert)
baby
     10. baby is a good wae tu gro folks (or start humans) (Don Herrod)
     11. baby is blessing & bother (Mark Twaen)
     12. baby is full time job for 3 adults (Erika Jong)
     13. baby is gods pinyun life shood go on (Karl Sandburg, 1940)
     14. baby mae be wunderful, but evree mother is grateful wen it sleep (Ralf W Emersun)
     15. em hu sae em sleep like a baby dont hav 1 (Leo Burk)
     16. even the best av famlees hav babees (Elinor G Smith)
     17. evree baby is gooder than sumwon els's (Charles Dikkens)
     18. evree baby need a lap (Henree Robin)
     19. Folks with & without baby feel sorry for the other (Leo J Burk)
baby
     20. grate investment...put milk intu baby (W Churchil)
     21. him hu sae him sleep like a baby dont hav 1 (Leo Burk)
     22. its a big deside (liz Stone)
     23. make babees is fun, but em gro up (MASH...Kernel Potter)
     24. the preteeest baby is friteful (Queen Viktoria)
     25. tu the werld yer nuthang.  Tu me yer the werld.

160. babysitter...
      1. babysitter=teen hu akt like adult wen adults go out & akt like teens
      2. dont yuze TV as yer babysitter (Bill Bixbee)
      3. grandma is babysitter hu watch the kids insted av the TV
      4. muvee=50$+babysitter, no wunder most rent a muvee (Robert Buksbaum)
      5. TV is the best babysitter (Jon Goodman)

161. bachler...   (bachelor in krat speek)
see also old maid wed wife
1. bachler...never made same mistake 1 time (Fillis Diller) 2. bachler=man hu go thru life without a hitch 3. bachler=oenlee man hu never lie tu wife 4. bachler=souvenir sum woman found 5. bachler=sumwon wemen still sampel 6. bachler av arts...luv wemen but stae a bachler (Helen Roeland) 7. bachler fare: bred, cheez, kiss (Jonathan Swift) 8. bachler is a boy forever (Helen Roeland) 9. bachler is selfish...him cheeted sum woman outta a divors (Don quin) bachler 10. bachler kum tu werk from dif direkshun evree morn (Solom Aleichem) 11. bachler like tu chaes but not the katch 12. bachler need be inspired tu sex a woman, wedded man need exkuez (Helen Roeland) 13. bachlers hav a konshens, marreed men hav a wife (H L Menken, 1930) 14. bachlers no more bout wemen, if em didnt em wood wed (H L Menken) 15. bachlers shood pae more tax, not faer tu be happeeer (Oskar Wild) 16. bachlers tempt wemen (Oskar Wild) 17. bachler's life...good brakefast, flat lunch, bad supper (Fransis Bakon) 18. bachler's life is not for a singel man (Sam Goldwin) 19. best werks R from singel, kidless men (Fransis Bakon) bachler 20. evree politishun (polikan) shood be born an orfan, & stae a bachler (Claudia Jonsun) 21. God let his son die a bachler, so wi not man? (H L Menchen) 22. I be wed tu a singel life (Richard Krashaw) 23. I will never agin see a 20-yr old bachler (Shakespeer) 24. if a man is rich, him must want a wife (Jane Austen) 25. luv an old bachler is bad (Jeen Harris) 26. maeraej mae hert, but no sex=no fun (Sam Jonsun) 27. marry a bachler=bi 2nd hand furnishuer (H Jaksun Brown) 28. never trust husband 2 far or bachler 2 neer (Helen Roeland) 29. oenlee good husbands stae bachler, 2 konsiderat tu wed (Peter Dun) bachler 30. pik the best...good bachler & good wife (Robert L Stevensun) 31. singel man is not kompleet, like half av a sizzers (Ben Franklin) 32. skared av wemen is th basis av good helth (Spaen) 33. tell a lie ...in a boy=fault, in luver=art, bachler=deed (Helen Roeland) 34. wen I sed I wood die a bachler, I didnt thank I wood liv tu wed (Shakespeer) 35. will I never agin see a bachler av 60? (Shakespeer)
back bak
162. bad...
see also bad predikt good
1. 90% əv adults R onest & hard werking. its the louzee other 2% that giv us a bad name, but we elekted em (Lily Tomlin) 2. adapt...make the best av the bad yu kant avoid (Alexander Hamilton) 3. all grate speekers started bad (Ralf W Emersun) 4. babees R never bad (Luisa mae Alkot) 5. bad artists alwaes admire eech other (Oskar Wild) 6. bad dae? Take a nap (Karree Sno) 7. bad dae fishing is gooder than good dae at werk 8. bad dog=good barker. bad man=good talker (Budda) 9. bad exkuse is gooder than nun (Tom Fuller) bad 10. bad for hart...run up staers, run down sumwon (Benard Baruch) 11. bad gaen=true loss (Ben Franklin) 12. bad habit is like a good bed...eezee tu get in, hard tu get out. 13. bad haer dae 14. bad is good, wen badder kum (Dane or Nors) 15. bad kall=mistake 16. bad konshens hav good memree 17. Bad laws R the baddest tipe av tyranny (Ed Burk, 1750) 18. bad luk tu be superstishus (Andru Mathis) 19. bad man disgize self with werds. His hart is deseet (proverbs) bad 20. bad memree...yu get tu hav the same fun many times (Fred Nietzshe) 21. bad memree=soers av good-old-daes (Frank Adams) b. bad memree is responsabel for good-old-daes (Frank P Adams) 22. bad mouth others is poor wae tu praes self (Will Durant) 23. bad munee drive good outta serkalashun (Grishams law) 24. bad naber is a misforchun, good naber is a blessing (Hesiod, 800bc) 25. Bad nuz...oenlee thang that go faster than lite (Doug Adams) 26. Bad ofishals R elekted wen good sitizens dont vote (Jorj J Nathan) 27. Bad penny alwae retern 28. Bad planning on yer part dont make it an emerjensee on mi part 29. Bad taste get yu thru the dae faster (Andy Warho) bad 30. bad thangs dont die 31. bad thangs happen 32. bad tu the bone 33. bad tu badder 34. bad water will put out bad fire (English) 35. bad wemen never take the blame (anita Brookner) 36. bad wether get better, a bad man never 37. baddest prisun is kloesed hart (Jon Paul) 38. better tu liv in the attik than in a hous with a bad woman (Chauser, 1380) 39. beware av bad wall, savaej dog, quarelsum persun bad 40. brake a mirrer & yu get 7 yeers bad luk 41. cheer up, the bad part is yet tu kum 42. dont du bad for good reesuns (Tom Hardy, 1875) 43. eech yeer, 1 bad habit rueted out. In time yu bekum nu man (Ben Franklin) 44. evil werd dubel bad deed (Shakespeer) 44. evil werd dubel bad deed (Shakespeer) 45. faer wether freend dezert yu in bad times 46. fawls freends leev yu in bad times (Aesop, 600bc) 47. golf is a bad wae tu ruin a good walk (Mark Twain) 48. grammarians R alwaes bad (Reme deGourmont) 49. grate spenders R bad lenders (Ben Franklin) bad 50. guvt solushun tua prob is as bad as the prob (Miltun Freedman) 51. how bad it hert tu luze sumwon yu never had 52. if a blak kat kross yer path, yu will hav bad luk (superstishun) 53. if oenlee yu kood brake bad habits as eezee as yu brake harts (Christofer Spranger) 54. if yu get a good wife yu will be happy, a bad won & yu bekum a filosofer (Sokrates, 410bc) 55. it is a bad wind that blo nowon good (based on sael ships that need wind) 56. laws kontrol bad men, kondukt kontrol good men 57. left alone, thangs go from bad tu badder 58. media is a modern werd for bad (Graham Green, 1970) 59. munee is a good servant but a bad master (Fransis Bakon, 1600) bad 60. no chaenj kan fix bad character (Ralf W Emersun, 1870) 61. red meet is not bad for yu. Blue-green meet...thats bad (Tommy Smothers) 62. reel bad men R as rare as reel good men (Jorj B Shaw) 63. Theer is no nonsens bad nuff tu stop guvt from make it its kreed (Berstrand Russel) 64. Theer R no bad boys. Maby bad homes, traening, zampels, thank (Ed Flanagan) 65. tis a bad kook that kant lik his fingers (Shakespeer) 66. truth with bad intent beet all lies yu invent (Will Blake) 67. tu bad all hu no how tu run the kuntree drive taxees (Jorj Burns) 68. tuno is good, dont no is bad (Sokrates, 450 bc) 69. wen a woman is bad, her is at her best bad 70. wi du bad thangs happen tu good folks? 71. yu sae its bad tu die. Straenj komplaent from folks hu never lived (Mark Twaen) 163. bad predikshuns, bad komments, bad mistakes, bad werds see also...faemus last werds 1. 4 frigits will du the biz; no need for military foers (Lord North=Brit prime minister, 1774, bout rebels in Amerika) 2. 640K memree is plentee for evreewon (Bill Gates, 1981) 3. aerplanes R toys av no military value (Foch=boss av the stradegy sekshun av French War Dept) 4. Amerika dont no how tu make aerplanes (Herman Goering=boss av German aer foers, 1942) 5. Beetels: Dekka Rekords rejekt em: "we dont like theer sound" 6. but wot is a mikrochip good for? (chip deziner, 1968) 7. demokrasee will be ded bi 1950 (Jon Langdon, 1936) 8. dont need a fone. We hav plentee messenger boys (Hed av Brit Post Offis, 1876) 9. Einstein: 1896: his teecher sed "he'll never amount tu NE-thang" in 1905 him made 6 erth-shattering therees, inkluding relativity bad predikt 10. Elvis, 1954: konsert manager fired Elvis & sed "yu otta go bak tu drive truks" 11. evreethang that kan be invented has ben (Charles Duel, boss av US patent offis, 1899) 12. fliing masheen is utterlee nonposabel (Simon Nukomb, 1902) 13. fone hav 2 many probs & no yuzeful value (Western Yuenyun, 1876) 14. for the tuerist hu wanna get awae from it all...Vietnam Newsweek predikted best vakashun spots for the "late 60's" 15. Hawaii...a werld av happy in an oeshun av pees (Hawaii Tuerist Buro, Oct 1941) [6 weeks b4 Japs bomb perl-harber] 16. heveeer than aer masheen will never fli (Lord Kelvin, 1895 & 1899) him was then a faemus Brit sientist in 1907 (4 yrs after Rite brothers) Lord Haldane sed "man will never fli" he was the boss av British military then 17. hoersless kaeraej will never be as kommon as bikes (1899: Literary Digest) 18. hu wanna heer akters talk? H M Warner av Warner Studios, 1927) 19. I dont beleev stones fell from the ski (Tom Jeffersun, 1790) bad predikt 20. I dont like theer sound (Dekka Rekords terned down the Beetles in 1962) 21. I dont see NE reesum for the vyues in mi book tu shok relijus sensabilitees (Charles Darwin, 1869) 22. I thank theer is a werld-wide market for 5 puters (Tom Watson=prez av IBM, 1943) b. Theer mae be a werld market for 5 puters 23. if smoking plae a role in lung kanser, it is miner (W C Hueper, National Kanser Institute, 1954) 24. I'm glad its Klark Gabel tu fall on his faes (Gary Kooper wen him terned down part as Ret Butler in muvee "gon with the wind") 25. in the fyucher, puter mae wae as littel as 1.5 tons (Popular Mechaniks, 1949) 26. inflate is ded (Internashunal munee fund, 1959) 27. it is alredy 2 late tu avoid mass starvahsun (Denis Haes, 1970) 28. it is pees for our time (30 Sep 1939: Nevil Chamberlaen=Brit prime minister) 29. it is unlikely NE-1 will find unnoed land av NE value (kommitte tu King Ferdinand av Spaen, 1486) bad predikt 30. it will be gon bi June [it=Rok & Roll] (Variety mag, 1955) 31. Jap kar industree is not likelee tu karv out much av US kar market (Biz Week, 2 Aug 1968) 32. kapitalism will kill self (Karl Marx, about 1935) 33. kar has reeched its limit (Sientifik Amerikan mag, 1909) 34. lite bulb is not werth our tenshun (1878: Brit paliament kommittee) 35. Luis Pastuers germ theree is reedikulus (Pachet=professer at Tuluse, 1872) 36. man will never fli kauz thats rezerved for angels (father av the Rite brothers) 37. miniskirt: 1966: KoKo sed "miniskirt is a bad joke" 38. Navy: "U S Navy wont be kot napping", Frank Nox (Sekratary av the Navy), 4 Des 1941 39. no fliing masheen will ever fli from Nu York tu Paris (Orvill Rite) bad predikt 40. no woman will be prime minister in mi lifetime (Margaret Thatcher, 1974) 41. nowon will ever bild a bigger aerplane (Boeing engineer, about 1935) Him talk bout the 247=Boeing passerger plane than hold 10 42. nowon will ever want a puter in the home (Ken Olson=Digital founder, 1977) 43. opra not over til fat brod sing (Washington Post, 13 Jun 1978) 44. professer Goddard dont understand action & reakshun (1921: NY times) [em retrakted the story on 17 Jul 1969 as Apollo 11 neered the Moon) 45. Prosperity: 1966: Time mag sed "Bi 2000, masheens will make so much evreewon in US will be independently rich" 46. puter is a fad that will fade awae (boss av Prentis-Hall, 1957) 47. Raegan dont hav the presidential look (United Artis rejekt him from role in a muvee, 1964) 48. rail travel at hi speed is not possabel kaus folks die av "asphyxia" (suffokate) Dr Dion Lardner, bout 1840 (England) 49. reed mi lips: NO NU TAXES (Jorj Bush, 1988) bad predikt 50. remote shopping will flop (Time, 1966) 51. rokket will never be abel tu leev erths atmospheer (1936: NY Times) 52. short-time satir pulp (Time mag sed this bout Mad mag, 1956) 53. sorry, yu dont no how tu yuze English (San Fran Examiner tu Rudyard Kipling, 1889) 54. spaes travel is bunk (Harold Jones=Brit boss astronomer, 1957=2 weeks b4 sputnik) 55. spaes travel is utter bilj (Richard Van Woolee=Brit boss astronomer, 1956) 56. the bomb will never go off. I speek as an xpert on xplosives (Admiral Leehy) [him was 1 av the big-wigs on the mahattan projekt that made the a-bomb] 57. the deth rate from starv tu deth will be 200 milyun/yeer bi 1980 (Paul R Ehrlich, 1970) 58. the graduated inkum tax will abolish majer dif in welth bi 1982 (Irwin Edman, 1932, Kolumbia Univ) 59. the hoers is heer tu stae. The kar is a novelty (president av Michigan Save Bank tu Henree Ford, 1903) bad predikt 61. the idea the erth is not the senter av the yunivers is fawls, utterly heretikal (Katholik Cherch, 5 Mar 1616) 62. the portant fundamental laws av fiziks hav all ben diskuvered (Albert A Michelson, 1894) b. At most, siens mae add a fyu desimal points 63. the possabilities av aerplanes hav ben exhausted (Tom Edisun, 1895) 64. the role av woman will not chaenj (David Riesman, 1967..."soshal Sientist") 65. theer is no chans for kommunikashun Satellites (FCC boss, 1961) 66. theer is nuthang nu tu be diskuvered in fiziks (Lord Kelvin, 1900) 67. theer is no hint we kan ever get energy outta the atom (A Einstein, 1932) [but in 1939 him talked Roosevelt intu start werk on the a-bomb] 68. theer R 2 many books; it is evil (Martin Luther, 1530=him started the reformashun) 69. they kant hit an elefant at this distans (last werds av Gen Jon Sedgwich, 1864) bad predikt 70. Titanik..."its unsinkabel"...spokesman for Wite Star Line, 1912 71. tu far-fetched tu be konsidered (Sientifik Amerikan tu Goddard, 1940) Goddard proposed a rokket-plaen 72. tu put a man on the moon is a wild dreem werthy av Jules Vern. It will never be. (Lee DeForest, 1926 (him invent vakyuem tubes)) 73. tu tri tu redues paen in surgery is absurd (Dr Alfred Velpo, 1839) 74. TV..."Amerikans wont hav time for it", Ny York Times, 1939 75. TV mae be teknikally feezabel, but nowon will finans it (Lee DeForest, about 1940) 76. we R almost at the limit av all we kan lern with astronomy (Simon Nukomb, 1888) 77. we R the first & doubtless the last tu visit this hopeless plaes (Lt Jo Ives, 1861 at the Grand Kanyun) 78. we will bury yu (Nikita Kruschev, 1958) 79. wemen dont wanna vote (Kleevland=US pres, 1905) bad predikt 80. wireless hav no fyucher (1894, Lord Kelvin=Brit) 81. wireless muzik box [radio] hav no kommershal value (David Sarnof, 1925) 82. x-raes is a hoex (Lord Kelvin, 1899) 83. yu better get a sekratary job or wed (Book Modeling Ajensee tu Marilyn Monroe, 1944) 84. yu dont hav a kollej degree...Hewlett-pakkard tu Steev Jobs hu then founded Appel 85. yu will be home b4 the leefs fall (Kaiser Wilhelm tu German trueps, Aug 1914) [WW 1 lasted til Nov 1918=4 yeers] 164. bad thangs...bad stuff happen tu yu, evreethang go rong
see also dum thangs sumwon du kriminals du dum stuff
1. Alaska oil spill...averaej kost tu kleen seels=80,000$ eech. Tu selebrate, ekofreeks relees 2 seels (from hold & werk area) intu see. killer wale eet both as evreewon watch. 2. beech...Kleerwater, Flor...man sunbath in chaen on beech & bulldozer run over him. 3. been in eer...kid in Nairobi, Kenya got been stuk in eer. Dokter remuve it. Parents sae em dont hav munee tu pae dok. Dok put been bak in eer. 4. bomb...Iraj terrist Kay Rahnjet sent letter bomb. Not nuff stamps onit. Post Offis reterned it. Him opened it. It blo up. 5. ded woman in koffin...during seramony, her sit up and ask wotz going on. Her dotter keel over & die. 6. dirt...9 yr old Derik Hume was run over bi 1-ton roller & lived. Ground was wet & soft from raen. 7. hous...Maui, Hawaii...nu hous bern down kauz av short in the "home protekt system". & 1 yr b4 that, buglar broke intu his old home & stold the burglar alarm. 8. pigs...animal rites group in Bonn, Jermany protest at stokyard. 2000 pigs stampeed & stomp protesters tu deth. 9. poacher...shot a deer on rok overhang abuv him, it fall on him, kill him. 10. pole sitter in LA...kot flu & quit erlee. him find...his sponser went bust. his girlfrend left him. hous...elektrik & fone kut off. 11. skuel in Virjinia suspended 9-yr old boy kauz him sed his mint make him jump hier. West Virjinia...skuel suspended boy 3 daes for giv a koff drop tu other student. 12. wether...if yu dont like the wether, dont kall Al Nino in Kalifornya. hes sik av yu-all kall him tu komplaen bout the wether. 165. bad times... 1. av the bad times yu endure hope is the yuniversal kuer (Abe Kowlee, 1660) 2. bad times hav sientifik interest. Good lerner woodnt miss em (Ralf W. Emersun) 3. bad times introdues yu tu self 4. bad times R just round the korner, look forward tu despaer kant save demokrasee & dont much kare (Noel Koward) 5. character is appreesishated in bad times (Publius Tacitus, 100ad) 6. faer wether freend dezert yu in bad times 7. fawls freends leev yu in bad times (Aesop, 600bc) 8. good times, bad times. Our moods chaenj more than our forchuns (Tom Karliel) 9. in good times & bad times, I'll be at yer side. Thats wot freends R for 10. in good times folks make debts tu pae in bad times (Robert Quinlin) 11. in good times our freends no us, in bad times we no our true freends (Churston Kollins) 12. now is the winter av our diskontent (Shakespeer) [him meen the bad times R over.] but evreewon thank it meen "its so bad, theers no hope" 13. skuels R an ornament in prosperus times, a refuge in bad times (Aristotel) 14. survive bad times tu develop keraej (Barbara Angelis) 15. yu gotta survive bad times tu develop keraej (Barbara Angelis) 166. badder 1. oenlee thang badder than Demokrat or Republikan is wen the 2 werk tugether 167. baet... 1. baet & switch=promis a lot, delivel littel biz...ad sae yu hav it cheep. wen kustomer sho, tri reel hard tu sell sumthang els 2. hope is best baet...kuver NE hook (Oliver Goldsmith) 168. bag... 1. Bag & baggage=all yer stuff (started as military) 2. Bag of switches 3. hold the bag=get stuk with, foersed tu pae 4. let the kat outta the bag=tell a sekret 169. bak... 1. bak in the good old days 2. bak-seet driver...NE-1 in kar hu giv unwanted advise tu driver ie...tell him how tu drive 3. bak tu basiks =rethank the ground rules & assumpshuns 4. bak tu square 1=start over 5. bak tu the drawing bord=redezine based on speereeans 6. bak tu the salt mine =bak tu werk 7. bak tu the wall =desperat, em drove yu intu korner 7. bak wen Hector was a pup 8. bak wen I was yunger 9. I'll slap yu tu the bak side av noweer 170. baker's duzen=13=duzen+1 170. Bald... 1. a haer on the hed is werth 2 in the brush (Oliver Herford) 2. Bald as an eegel 3. Bald as a kuet (british vershun) 4. Bald as bare mountin top (Mathyu Arnold) 5. Bald in front=sexy, in bak=yer a thanker ball all over...yu thank yer sexy 6. Bald is neet (Don Herold) 7. better bald hed than no hed (Austin O'Mallee) 8. god gave sum braens, others haer 9. grae haer is a blessing, ask NE bald man 10. haer tudae, gon tumorro 11. how long yu keep yer haer depend on how wise yu chuezed yer parents (Ed R Nida) 12. skin is in, be proud av yer pate (Richard Sandomir) 13. wemen R bald on the chin kauz av the intens activity theer 170. ball... 1. ball & chaen=wife. Originally was a hevy burder yu had tu drag around 2. ball is in yer kort=we did our part & now its yer tern 3. balls tu the wall=max effort, max speed 3. I wondered wi the baseball look bigger. Then it hit me. 171. balloon... 1. balloon go up...origin=in war, the army send up obserb-ballon a littel b4 it plan tu attak tudae..."send up a ballon"=test a nu idea bi leek it tu press & see how much nois the publik make 172. ballpark figger=ruff gess 173. ballot... 1. ballot is stronger than the bullet (Abe Linkoln) 174. ban... banned werds & frazes see also...politikal korrekt zampels evree yeer from 1976, Mishigans' Lake Supeeer Univ make a list av banned werds & frazes from 2006 list: werd or fraze wi em ban it 1. ask yer dokter "chuabel vitamen morfine av marketing" 2. awesome silly tu sae a shue or mop is awesum zampel: "'mi mother was hit bi a kar' 'awesum'" 3. GITMO for guantanamo 4. gon/went missing make it sound like "missing" is a plaes yu wanna visit 5. now plaeing in theaters how often du yu see muvees in the landromat? 6. truthiness 7. undokumented alien du we also hav undokumented druggists? 8. weer pregnant du hubby feel left out? -------------- sum favorits from past yeers 1. erectile dysfunction 2. holidae tree 3. metrosexual 4. sho me the munee 5. shok & aw -------------- a fyu av the werds banned bi a guvt in the US, yuzyually a skuel 1. dialect 2. dirty old man 3. disabeled 4. dissenter 5. dogma 6. doorman 7. down's sindrome 8. draftman 9. drunk 10. duffer 11. dummy 12. dwarf -------------- sum werds banned bi sum Biz (non guvt orgs) 1. bern rate 2. best praktis 3. bi-in 4. deliverabels 5. hav a x event "hav a baby event" insted av giv birth 6. in a quality wae 7. kandy gift solutions 8. kritikal path 9. leverage 10. mission-critikal 11. offline (tu take a brake) 12. orthogonal 13. proaktive 14. repurpose (reyuze) 15. safe harber 175. banana 1. banana republik=small, week kuntree with farm ekonomee, yuzyually with korrupt diktater 2. banana=slang for nuts (krazee, mad, ku-ku, bonkers, daft, lunee) 3. wen I kollekt the fruet av mi laber, I slip on banana peel. 176. bandy werds=2 thro werds bak & forth=argue or smart ass komments 177. bank... 1. a bank is weer yu keep the guvt's munee til the tax man want it 2. bank lend yu umbrella in good wether & demand it bak wen it raen (Robert Frost) 3. bank on=depend on, kount on, reli on 4. bank will lend yu munee is yu kan pruev yu dont need it (Bob Hope) 5. banks R more dangerus than a standing army (Tom Jeffersun) 6. "bank on sumwon"=yu kan trust him, yu kan depend on him 7. "brake the bank"=yu win max $ at a kasino, or max at 1 tabel original...yu won so much at a gambel plaes, em went broke 8. it is eezeer tu rob bi setup a bank than bi hold up a bank (Bertolt Brecht, 1940) 9. "it wont brake the bank"=yu kan afford it, it dont kost much 10. "kri all the wae tu the bank" =take the munee & run him did sumthang yu thank is shadee or krooked, but its legal 11. "laff all the wae tu the bank"=mak munee very eezee 12. man without bank akkount is av littel akkount 13. oenlee thang yu kan take tu the bank is munee 14. wise tu liv with munee in the bank, fool tu die with munee left (French) 178. bankrupt... 1. baddest bankrups is man hu luze his enthusiasm (H W Arnold) 2. bankrupt...yu put yer munee in yer pokket & giv yer koet tu the krediters (Woody Allen) 3. if yu spend werd for werd with me, me will bankrupt yer wit (Shakespeer, 2 men av Verona) 4. wanna bankrupt sumwon? NE lawyer kan duit for yu. 5. we will bankrupt the ekonomee in vaen serch for absolute sekuritee (D D Eisenhower) 179. baptism av fire=yer first speereeens in reel werld a nu soldyer gets baptised in the first reel battelfeeld weer him fite 180. barbarian... 1. I walked down the iel as Konan the barbarian, bekame arnold the meek (Arnold Swartzinnager) 2. middel klass is prisuner av the barbarian 20th senshuree (Sinklaer Luis) 3. pardon him, Theodotus, he's a barbarian. Thank the kustoms av his tribe R laws av naecher (Jorj B Shaw, 1898, "Seeser & Kleopatra") 4. NE-1 kan be a barbarian. Take hard werk tu be sivilized (Leo Wolf) 181. bare faesed lier (him lie with inosent faes) 182. bargin... (bargain in krat) 1. a bargin=sumthang yu kant yuze at a pries yu kant resist (Frank P Jones) b. sumthang yu dont need at a pries yu kant resist 2. a man av faeth dont bargin with god (Gandi) 3. bargin...sumthang yu bi & then tri tu find a yuze for (Ben Franklin) 4. bargin=NE-thang yu thank the store will luze munee on (Kin Hubbard, 1900) 5. bargin basement dresses never fit 6. bargin is sumthang yu kant yuze at a pries yu kant refuze (Frank P Jones) 7. bargin like a jypsee, pae like a man 8. dont bargin for fish that R still in the water 9. dont drive hard bargin with artis (Bethhoven) bargin 10. du tu others for em wood duit tu yu (Charles Dikens, 1850) 11. faes problem b4 it kik yu harder than yu bargined for (king Stanislaus av Poland) 12. I hafta keep mi half av the bargin 13. if yu dont get wot yu want, yu bargined 2 hard over the pries (Rudyard Kipling) 14. if yu make bad bargin, hug it titer (Abe Linkoln) 15. its a bad bargin wen both luze (Proverbs) 16. lier & miser bargin fast 17. life is the biggest bargin, yu get it for nuthang (Yid) 18. make bargin kleer & plaen so afterward nowon komplaen 19. many onest folk thank yu gotta cheet tu get a bargin (Anatole Frans, 1900) bargin 20. mi hart is a bargin tudae. Will yu take it? (W C Feelds) 21. need never made good bargin (Ben Franklin) 22. oenlee if the bargin leev both happy will yu hav repeet biz 23. pae 2 much is no bargin & leed yu tu torment self after (Pliny) 24. sum "honest" folk thank yu gotta cheet the merchant tu get a bargin (Anatol Frans) 25. sumtimes it kost yu most for wot yu got for nuthang (Albert Einstein) 26. tu sell sumthang, tell woman its a bargin. Tell man its deduktabel (Erl Wilsun) 27. viktree dont kum at bargin-basement pries (D D Eisenhower) 28. wi du men rejois in good bargin. Ponder the morals av shopping (Henree W Beecher) 183 bark... 1. bark in the wind 2. bark up the rong tree 3. barking dog is more yuzeful than sleeping lion (Washington Irving) 4. barking dogs seldom bite 184. baseball: 1. if yu thank baseball is all I thank bout, yer off base 184. bash yer hed ginst brik wall=werk hard for hopeless kauz=no hope 185. basik... 1. bak tu basiks =rethank the ground rules & assumpshuns 2. basik...a programming tung weer if yu duit, yu wont admit it in publik 3. basik=hi level languish, apl=hi level anguish 4. basik reserch...wot I du wen I dont no wot me du (Werner von Braun) 186. bath... 1. bath is suksesful if kids get wetter than yu (Dee Stewart) 2. dont thro out baby with bath water In the old daes, famlee took 1 bath/yeer, all in 1 tub, & oenlee 1 batch av water Mael hed wash first, other men next, the wemen, then kids, then baby bi then the water was so dirtee, hard tu find baby in the tub 3. did yu take a bath tudae? wi? iz 1 missing? 4. for nasty tub ring, plae in yard all dae (Dee Stewart) 5. wen all els fael, take a bath (Rita Sherman) 187. bathroom saeings... 1. duit self, no maed servis 2. fresh water: 10 sents, yuzed water: 3 sents 3. hu waet outside the door yu never no dont dwaddel, him mae hafta go 4. I aem tu keep the bathroom kleer, yer aem will help 5. if theers a ring in the tub, pleez anser it 6. Note...replaes the toilet paper will NOT make yer braen fall out 7. oenlee time the werld beet a path tu mi door is wen Im in the bathroom 8. reeding room...bi apointment oenlee 9. save water, shower with a freend 10. splish, splash, I was taking a bath.... 11. we aem tu pleez. will yu aem 2, pleez. 12. we dont pis in yer ashtrae, so dont put yer butts in our pis 13. yer job is not dun til the paperwerk is dun 14. yu dont hafta brush all yer teeth, oenlee the wons yu wanna keep 188. battel-ax=big bad belligerent woman, yuzyually old & fat 189. batten down the hatches=prep for a storm (hatch=navy for door) 190. bats in the belfree=mad, krazy, nuts, ku-ku ("deranged" in krat) 191. be... 1. be all yukan (armee kommershal) 2. be as kareful tu chues yer pleshuers as yu du tu avoid trubel (Chineez) 3. be fast tu heer, slo tu speek, sloer tu get mad 4. be first-rate vershun av selk, not 2nd rate vershun av sumwon els 5. be greedy wen others R feerful, be feerful wen others R greedy. 6. be happy in yer werk 7. be happy is gooder than be king 8. be in yer bonnet (hood) 9. be it ever so humbel, theer is no plaes like home (1823, song) be 10. be kareful 11. be kareful wot yu ask for, yu mae get it 12. be kareful wot yu wish for, yu mae get it 13. be kind tu unkind folk. Em need it most (Arlee Brite) 14. be konfident & yukan lik NE-thang 15. be nies tu folks on yer wae up, yu mae meet em on the wae down 16. be prepared (Skout motto) 17. be redee tu speek yer mind & the lo-life will avoid yu (Will Blake, 1800) 18. be self (Jon Jakes) 19. be shuer yer rite, then duit (Davee Kroket) be 20. be sloe tu chooz a freend, sloer still tu chaenj freends (Ben Franklin) 21. be stil mi hart, yu met badder than this (Homer, 850bc) 22. be that as it mae,... 23. be true tu self (Shakespeer) 24. Be true tu yer teeth and they won't be false 25. be true tu yer werk, yer werd, & yer freend (Henree D. Thoro) 26. be wiser than others if yu kan, but dont tell em 27. be wot yu pretend tu be 28. be wot yu wood want tu seem tu be (Sokrates) 29. be wot yu R & be good at it (St Fransis) be 30. be wot yu seem tu be see also...bee (small fliing insekt) 192. be-all & end-all=if yu kan get awae with it (Shakespeer, McBeth) 193. be self... (being yourself in krat speek) 1. dont let sumwon define yu, define self (Harvee Fierstein) 2. dont tri tu be a sekond rate vershun av sumwon els (Judy Garland) 3. God gave yu a faes & yu make self another (Shakespeer) 4. if god wanted me different, he wooda made me dif (Jon von Goethe) 5. theer is just 1 life for eech av us:self (Euripides)
beauro burokrat krat
beauty byutee
194. bed... 1. bed av roses...regal konfort 2. bed is poor mans opera (Italy) 3. happeest time is wen yu lae awake in bed in the morn (Sam Jonsun, 1770) 4. I was born, I was wed, all danjer kum from bed (C H Web) 5. the bed is now as publik as the eet tabel (Angela Karter, 1990) 6. wot angel wake me from mi bed? (Shakespeer) 7. yu made yer bed, now lae init 195. bedtime... 1. kiss yer kids goodnite, even if em R alredee asleep (H Jaksun Brown) 2. never was a kid so pretty, mother not glad it sleep (Ralf W Emersun) 3. weer kyuet pajammas, never no hu yu will meet in yer sleep 196. Bee... (fliing insekt) 1. bee debaunch du (Emily Dikkensun) 2. Bee in yer bonnet=skatter-braen, sumwon hu dont konsentrate 197. Beezwax... 1. mind yer beezwas=mine yer biz, butt out, dont bother me, go awae 198. Beech... (beach in krat speek) 1. 3 grate sounds in naecher=raen, wind in woods, waves on the beech (Henree Beston) 2. beech: anshent erj tu shed shues & klothes & hav fun (Loren Eiselee) 3. bones as wite as sand on a beech (Hilda Dulittel) 4. if yer lukky nuff tu be on the beech, yer lukky nuff 5. lae on a beech & waet for a gift from the see (Ann M Lindberg) 6. like a wave on a beech. Many went b4 & many more evermore (Jon Ashbery) 7. mae yer life be sunsets, kold drinks, & sand tween yer toes 8. mae yu alwaes hav sand in yer shues & a shell in yer pokket 9. palm trees, see breez bi the kleer blue sees hot aer, sun kissed haer endless summer, take me theer 10. sing on the beech til yer beyond deth's reech (Filip Larkin) 11. stae on the beech. Nativs R kanabels. Eet liers same as onest men (Kaptin Nemo from 20000leegs under the see) 12. the beech waet like an alter (Ann Sexton) 13. werds tudae R like seeweed from the beech (Cyril Konnaly, 1944) 14. yu dont no how many freends yu hav til yu rent a hous on the beech 199. beer & forbeer 200. beerd the lion in his den=konfront foe on his ground 201. beet... 1. beet a retreet...from daes wen army yuzed drums tu signal the trueps later em yuzed buggel & it bekame "sound retreet" 2. beet round the bush=never get tu the point=avoid the subjekt kum from 1 man beet bush tu kauz bird tu fli & others get the bird 3. beet the band 4. beet the rap...kriminal go free. yuzyually implie bi krooked meens. 202. begger... 1. begger deskripshun=beyond beleef 2. beggers kant be chuezers (dont getta chuez) (Jon Haewood, 1546) 203. Begin... 1. begin is yuzyually skary, end is oft sad the stuff tween em make it werthwile (Sandra Bullok) 204. Behind... 1. Behind evree kloud is a silver lining 2. behind evree man is a woman & behind her is nuther man hu look at her behind 3. behind evree man is a woman hu komplaen him no good (or not so hot) 4. behind evree man is a woman hu push him tu make sumthang av self 5. behind evree suksessful man is a sprized woman (Mary Peersun) 6. Behind the 8 ball 7. Behind the fonee Hollywood tinsel is the reel tinsel (Oskar Levant) 205. behold I see a pale hoers; his name is deth; him follo behind.(Revalashuns) 206. bek & kall...yu gotta jump at wons wen boss kall 207. beleev... (belief in krat speek) 1. beleef is the foundashun yu bild life on (Alfred Montapert) 2. beleev...dont beleev wot yu heer, beleev half wot yu see & 1/4 wot yuno be true 3. beleev em hu seek truth, dout em hu find it (Andrae Gide) 4. beleev in self, others will follo 5. beleev yu kant duit & yu kant (French) 6. beleever is hapeeer than skeptik, same as drunk is hapeeer than sober (Jorj B Shaw) 7. beleever is happy, douter is wise 8. better a mind open tu wunder, than kloesed bi beleef (Gerry Spens) 9. dont beleev it tile yu kan eet it or spend it beleev 10. eezeer tu beleev than tu dout (E D Martin) 11. evreewon prefer tu beleev than tu thank (Seneka) 12. evreewon shood beleev in sumthang. I beleev I'll hav a drink. 13. for em hu beleev, no proof is needed. Em hu dont beleev, no proof is possabel (Stuart Chase) 14. I kan beleev NE-thang if it is not kredabel (Oskar Wild) 15. if yu beleev, yu dont need proof. If yu dont, no proof is possabel) 16. konvikshuns R more danjerus than lies (Fred Nietzshe) 17. man treet his pinyuns as prinsapels (Herbert Agar) 18. martyr pruev beleef is intens, dont sho it be rite (Arthur Schweitzer) 19. me be dumfounded bi non beleevabel thangs others beleev (Leo Posten) beleev 20. men beleev wot em want (Juleeus Seesar) 21. men most beleev wot em dont understand (Pliny, 75ad) 22. O wot a tangeled web we weev wen we push wot we beleev (Laurens Peter) 23. sumtimes me beleev 6 nonpossabel thangs b4 brakefast (Lues Karrol) 24. The publik will beleev NE-thang as long as it is NOT based on truth (Edith Stilwell) 25. theerees we beleev, we kall fakts. Fakts we dont beleev, we kall theerees (Felix Kohen) 26. tu see is not tu beleev (Rod Serling) 27. wot yu beleev depend on wot yu R (Noah Porter) 208. bell... 1. bell the kat (fabel bout mouses put bell on kat, so heer it kum=safe) moral...make shuer yu setup danjer detekter 2. bells & wistels=goodees, xtra stuff av littel value, flashy du-dads 209. bellee shake like jello (fat man laff) 210. belo the belt=bad, dont plae bi the rules 211. belong... 1. yu belong tu a kuntree, professhun, sivilizashun (Antoine Saint-Exupery) Ben Franklin...Ben Franklin 212. Bend... 1. Bend like a willow or break like an oak 2. Bend over bakward=tri xtra hard, go the xtra mile
beneeth under
213. bern... (burn in krat speek) 1. bern the kandel on both ends=werk 2 hard 2. bern the midnite oil=werk late 3. berning question 214. beside the point (not relevant, dont appli) 215. best... 1. best=wot suppli most-happy for most folks (Fransis Hutchensun, 1700) 2. best anteeks R old freends 3. best armer is tu stae outta raenj 4. Best fish I ever flopped a lip on 5. Best freend...no yu but stil put up with yu 6. best guvt=no guvt (Oskar Wild, 1880) 7. best hoers dont alwaes win 8. best kyuer for temper is a long walk 9. Best laed plans of mice and men oft go ari (Robert Bern, 1785) 10. Best looking girl I ever took a gander at 11. best mirrer is old freend 12. best needel is not sharp at both ends (Chineez) 13. best thang tu hav up yer sleev is a funny bone 14. best thangs in life R free 15. best welth=good helth & spous (Ben Franklin) 16. best (or the most) yu kan hope for in life is sum mae be sad wen yu die 17. not good nuff tu du yer best, first yu gotta deside wot tu du (Ed Deming) 216. better... (gooder in non-krat) 1. 1 Bird in the hand is better than 2 in the bush 2. bad wether get better, a bad man never 3. better 1 dokter than 3 (Pole) 4. better 3 hrs erlee than 1 minut late (Shakespeer) 5. better 1000 enemees outside than 1 inside 6. better a begger than a fool 7. Better a big fish in a little pond than a little fish in a big pond 8. better a leen agreement than a fat lawsuet 9. better a man av value than a suksesful man (A Einstein) better... 10. better a mind open tu wunder, than kloesed bi beleef (Gerry Spens) 11. better alone than in bad kumpanee 12. better boelegs than no legs 13. Better ded than dishonor 14. Better diamond with flaw than perfekt rok 15. better half=wife 16. better if rich...men, choklat, koffee 17. better late than never (Jon Haewood, 1545) 18. better safe than sarree (sorry in krat speek) (Sam Luver, 1818) 19. better than a black land farm better... 20. better the devil yuno than the 1 yu dont 21. better tu be born lukky than good lookin (Russya) 22. better tu be happy than wise 23. better tu be quotabel than onest (Tom Stoppard) 24. better tu be witty fool than foolish twit 25. better tu die on yer feet than liv on yer nees (Emil Zapata) 26. better tu giv than tu get (original) 27. better tu giv than tu get, even better tu giv advise (Mark Twaen) 28. better tu hav inkun than tu be fasinating (Oskar Wild) 29. better tu like the chaenjing seesuns than tu luv spring (Jorj Santayana) better... 30. better tu liv in the attik than in a hous with a bad woman (Chauser, 1380) 31. better tu no sum quesshuns than no all ansers (James Thurber) 32. better tu pae a good waej than tu giv charitee (Sam Jonsun, 1750) 33. better tu tri and luze than tu not tri & sukseed 34. better tu weer out than rust out 35. Bigger is better 36. braens R better than brawn 37. choklat is better than sex (Alicia Silverstone) 38. find fault is eezee, du better is hard (Plutarch, 100ad) 39. strive for better, we oft ruin wotz good (Shakespeer, King Leer, 1605) better... 40. than a new pencil 41. than bakon 42. the devil yuno than the 1 yu dontno (R Taverner, 1540) 43. tu ask sum quesshuns than tuno all ansers (James Thurber) 44. tu ask the wae than get lost 45. tu be yer freend's nettel than his ekko 46. tu dare mitee deeds (Theodore Rosevelt) 47. tu die on yer feet than liv on yer nees (Emil Zapata) 48. tu fite (quarrel, squabbel) than be lonesum (Skot) 49. tu giv than tu get (than tu reseev, take) better... 50. tu hav fun as yu go, even if yu dont get theer (Budda) 51. tu hav strong soul than strong bodee (Pythagoras) 52. tu let em thank yu R a fuel than tu open yer mouth & remuev all dout 53. tu lite a kandel than kers the dark (Karl Sagan, Chineez) 54. tu liv in a wilderness than with kontenshus woman (Proverbs) 55. tu liv in the attik than in a hous with a bad woman (Chauser, 1380) 56. tu liv with a lion than a nagging woman (Chauser, 1380) 57. tu much than tu littel 58. tu no sum quesshuns than no all ansers 59. tu prevent than tri tu kyuer (fix) better... 60. tu slip with foot than with tung (Ben Franklin) 61. yu preech better sermon with yer life than yer mouth (Oliver Goldsmith, 1770)
between tween
217. beware... 1. beware av a slik talker (good talker, slik tung) 2. beware av bad wall, savaej dog, quarelsum persun 3. beware av bern yer bridges wen yu kross em [leev yer opshuns open] 4. beware av get shado insted av substans (Aesop) 5. beware av Greeks with gifts (or Greeks beering gifts) 6. beware av him hu wanna chaenj evreethang, or nuthang (Nansee Astor) 7. beware av quiet dog & still water (Jerman) 8. beware av programmer with skrudriver 9. beware av silent dog & deep water beware 10. beware av small spend, small leek kan sink big ship (Ben Franklin) 11. beware av strong drink...yu mae shuet at revenueer & miss 12 beware av the *...look for tiny print sumweer, tu small tu reed 13. beware av twice boiled meet & old foe rekonsiled (Ben Franklin) 14. beware av yung dokter & an old barber (Ben Franklin) 15. beware behind a mule, in front av a goet, on all sides av a fool (Edgar How) 16. beware furee av skorned woman 17. beware man av 1 book (English) 18. beware persun with 2 faeses (Dutch) 19. beware persun with nuthan tu luze beware 20. beware wen god let luse a thanker on this planet (Ralf W. Emersun) 21. Bier beware (Roman) 218. beyond... 1. beyond the pale=out av bounds, over the line, off limit 2. beyond the sunset 219. Bi, tipe 1=pae munee tu get sumthang (purchasing in krat speek) 1. Bi it for a song=cheep, bargin 220. Bi, tipe 2=preprosishun (by in krat speek) 1. bi & bi=sumtime, dont no wen 2. bi hook or bi krook 3. bi the lite av the moon 4. Bi the same token 5. bi the skin av yer teeth 6. bi the swet av yer brow 221. Bibel... 1. Bibel=devine inspierd book, just rite for yer naeber (Ambrose Beers) 2. Bibel is an inspiration for em hu dont understand it (Jorj Santayana) 3. Bibel is literacher, not dogma (Jorj Santayana) 222. Bied yer time=waet paeshent for yer chaens 223. Bier beware (Roman) 224. Big... 1. Big appel=nikname for Nu York Sittee 2. Big as a bare (bear in krat speek) 3. Big as a blimp 4. Big as a gues aeg 5. Big brother...story bi Jorj Orwell bout guvt see evreethang 6. Big cheez=brass, portant persun 7. Big ie, littel vyu 8. Big jobs gotu em hu outgro small jobs (Ralf W. Emersun) a. Big jobs gotu men hu pruev abilitee bi outgro small jobs (RWE) 9. Big print giv, small print take awae [beware av the *...look for tiny print sumweer, tu small tu reed] 10. big-shot is littel-shot hu keeped shueting (Kris Morlee) 11. big trees keep littel 1's down 12. big wife & big bard dont du man no harm 13. no task is 2 big or 2 small 225. Bigger... 1. Bigger em R, the harder em fall 2. Bigger is better 3. Bigger than a blue dog tick 4. Bigger than Dallas 5. Biggest enemee av the nek is the tung 6. the bigger em R, the harder em fall 7. the biggest mistake is tu alwaes be rite (Sam Butler, 1912) 226. Bigamee... (bigamy in krat speek) 1. an old fello av lime had 3 wifes at a time wen asked wi replie 1's absurd, 2 is a krime 2. Bigamee...1 wae tu avoid divors publicity & alimony kost (Oliver Herford) 3. Bigamee...2 rites make 1 rong (Bob Hope) 4. Bigamee is...yu hav 1 tu many wifes. Monogamee is the same (Oskar Wild) 5. du bigamee meen yu hav 1 wife 2 many? no, 1 wife kan be 2 many. 227. Bigot... 1. Bigot: NE-1 attached tu diff pinyun (Ambrose Beers) 2. Bigot=dogma slave (Gilbert Chesterton, 1930) 3. Bigot=oenlee won hu kan win argument with liberal (Rush Limbaug) 4. Bigot delite in ridikule kauz him wanna be martyr (Sidnee Smith) 5. Bigot drawf his sole bi shut out truth (Edwin Chapin, 1800) 6. Bigot hav rite tu speek, me hav rite tu ignore him (Laura Parker) 7. Bigot is saekred dazeez (heraclitus, 500bc) 8. Bigot murder relijun tu skare fools with its goest (Carles Kalton, 1820) 9. kant reesun=fool, wont=bigot, dont dare=slave (Andru Karnege or Will Drummond) 10. most bigoted ...em with leest konvikshuns (G K Chesterton) 228. bike... (bicycle in krat speek) 1. Wi kant bike stand alone? 2-tired 229. bild... 1. bild a hous 1 brik at a time 2. I seed a professhunal bilding & asked it how get from amatuer tu profeshunal. It sed its a sekret. 230. bimbo... see also...blond
see also bad predikt bimbo (Dum blond) bloopers bumper stikkers deth bed werds dum...zampels english goofs faemus last werds funnee insults jokes
kort funnee silly laws moron naeshun trate nok-nok jokes rednek jokes riddels sarkasm shop sine toomstone wi did the chicken kross the roed? wot du yu get wen yu kross
1. aktress go thru 3 fazes...bimbo, lawyer, Jessika Tandy (Megan Gallager) 2. bimbo: wot time is it? woman: 11:20 bimbo: straenj, evreewon I ask giv a different time 3. did yu heer bout the bimbo hu lokked self in kar? Had tu brake the windo tu get out. 4. differ...wore sae "arent yu dun yet?" bimbo..."dun alredee?" blond..."I thank I'll paent the seeling" 5. I'm not just anuther bimbo (Christina Aguilera) 6. how du bimbo skru in lite bulb? put it in sokket & waet for werld tu revolv round her. 7. how du bimbo tern on lite after sex? kik open the kar door. 8. how du yuno the sekratary is a bimbo? The wite-out on puter skreen. 9. how kan yu tell the bimbo was on the puter? joystik is wet. 10. I'm a bimbo, wotz yer xkues? 11. wi did bimbo kross the street? dont mater, bi then she forgot wi. 12. wi did bimbo put lipstik on forhed? she wanted tu make up her mind. 13. wi did bimbo stare at the oranj juis karton? It sed konsentrate. 14. wi du bimbo weer red lipstik? its warning sine...stop, rong hole. 15. wi R bimbo jokes so short? So engineers kan understand em. 16. wot did bimbo name her pet zebra? spot. 17. wot did bimbo sae after sex? R yu gies all on the same teem? 18. wot du yu get wen yu put bimbo in the freezer? frosted flake. 19. wot du yu kall 2 bimbos side-bi-side with eers tugether? windtunnel. 20. wot du yu kall a bimbo with 2 live braen sells? pregnant. 231. bird... 1. 1 bird dont meen it is summer (Jon Haewood, 1500) 2. 1 Bird in the hand is better than 2 in the bush 3. 1 swallo dont meen its summer (Aristotel) 4. a bird a nest, a spider a web, a man a freend (Will Blake) 5. a littel bird told me (sekret soers) 6. as free as a bird 7. bird in hand is safer than bird overhed 8. birds av a fether stik tugether (flok tugether) 9. Bird's ie vyu bird 10. bird in a gilded kage [sho bird] 11. eet like a bird (kan meen eet littel, or alwaes hungree) based on fawls beleef birds dont eet much 12. erlee bird get the werm (egads, hu wanna eet werms?) 13. erlee bird get the worm, mous 2 get the cheez 14. faeth without werks is like bird without wings (Fran Bomont, 1610) 15. for the birds [haerbraen idea] 16. free as a bird 17. half av modern drugs, yu shood thro em out the windo, sept birds mite eet em (Martin Fisher) 18. Kill 2 birds with 1 rok (acheev 2 goels at same time) 19. Maeraej is like a bird in a kaej...the ins want out & the outs want in bird 20. nu Jersee state bird=mosqueeto (Andy Warho) 21. perfekt summer dae...sun shine, breez blo, birds sing, moer broke (James Dent) 22. praes for past triump is fether from ded bird (Paul Eldridj) 23. solitude is bird traks in the sno (Ed Hoagland) 24. sum nuzpapers R oenlee fit tu line birdkaejes (Spiro Agnu, 1985) 25. wonderful bird, the pilikan bill hold more than bellikan damed if I see howhekan....(Dixon L Merrit) 26. woods wood be silent if oenlee the best birds sing (Henree vanDike) [yuze the talent yu hav] 232. birth... see also...born 1. birth make babees & mothers (Barb K Rothman) b. birth make more than babees, it make strong mothers 2. birth set yu on the path tu yer deth (Ed Yung, 1700) 3. birth start our deth [evreewon die] (Bishop Hall) 4. em equate birth with sik & dazeez. is bad. (Karla Hartlee) 5. even at birth, deth oenlee stand aside a littel evree dae him kum kloeser (Robert Bolt) 6. good birth is good, but yer ansesters get the kredit (Plutarch, 100ad) 7. its not birth, its virchue that make a dif (Voltaer) 8. theer is no kyuer for birth & deth, sept tu hav fun tween em (Jorj Santayana) 9. we R born naked, wet, & hungree, get 1 good spank, then it get badder 10. yer birth is a mistake yu spend yer hole life tri tu fix (Chuck paloniuk) 233. birthdae... 1. best wae tu remember wife's birthdae is tu forget it 1 time 2. birthdaes R grate, the more yu hav, the longer yu liv 3. diplomat remember a womans birthdae but not her aej (Robert Frost) 4. I see yer birthdae is 17 Apr...wot yeer? anser=evree yeer 5. theer is no kyuer for the kommon birthdae (Jon Glen) 6. theer kum a time wen nowon will kare bout yer birthdae...aej=11 234. bit... 1. tu the bitter end=keep triing no matter wot 235. bite... 1. be onest & indrustreus. Spend less than yu get. Yer pokket will thrive. Hunger wont bite. Naked wont freez yu. (Ben Franklin) 2. bite off more than yu kan chue...take on bigger job than yu kan du b. dont bite off more than yu kan chue (Proberbs) 3. bite off more than yu kan chue, then chu like mad (Peter Brok) 4. bite the bullet=take on a big bad job yu ben delaeing 5. bite the dust =die (bad gie drawed gun faster) 6. bite the hand that feed yu=no gratitude (Ed Burk, 1760) 7. dog thats gonna bite, dont sho its teeth (Terk) 8. dogs dont bite me. humans du. (Marilyn Monroe) 9. dogs luv freends & bite foe. Folks hate evreewon (Sigmund Froid) bite 10. dont bark if yu kant bite (Frans) 11. dont bite pleshuer til yuno theer's no hook init (Tom Jeffersun) 12. even a hare will bite wen kornered (Chineez) 13. fish bite best on Sundae (James M Barree) 14. giv wae tu a mad dog that mite bite yu. Even kill the dog after wont kyuer the bite (Abe Linkoln) 15. folks hu hav dog, dont hav the keraej tu bite yu (August Strindberg) 16. him hu bite the hand that feed him also lik the boot than kik him (Erik Hoffer) 17. if it kan lik, it kan bite (Frans) 18. if yu feed a starving dog, it wont bite yu. Thats the dif tween man & dog (Mark Twaen) 19. konshens bite like dog bite rok (Fred Nietzshe) bite 20. konshens is like dog that dont bite bu bark forever (Proverbs) 21. kut yer werk intu bite-size peeses (Dennis Waetlee) 22. mad is him? Then I hope he will bite sum av mi Jenrals (King Jorj 2) 23. mi storees bite me on the leg, so I rite til the bite go awae (Rae Bradbury) 24. sum sae histree is dull. An ant wons bited Jessee James on the forhed And yu stil thank histree is dull? (Jak handy) 25. tri tu define self is like tri tu bite yer teeth (Alan Watts) 26. truth taest good if we bite it good (T S Eliot) 27. we dont no wot we want, but gonna bite sumwon tu get it (Will Rogers) 28. wen I'm drunk, I bite (Bet Midler) 29. wen yu eet elefant, duit 1 bite at a time (Creiton Abrams) 236. BIZ... ("business" in krat speek) 1. 40 for yu, 60 for me, thats equal partners (Jerald Barzan) 2. a biz man will sell his soel tu the devil for the promis av 5¢ more profit. (3¢ for the wife) 3. big get bigger, small get wiped out (Menshulan Riklis) 4. biz: if yu dont hav NE, yu go outta 5. biz=art av extrakt munee from other's pokets without violens (Max Amsterdam) 6. biz=other folk's munee (Alex Dumas, 1850) 7. biz=persuade krowds (Gerald Lee) 8. biz b4 pleshuer or biznes b4 pleshure 9. biz is like oil...dont mix with NE-thang els <****>biz 10. biz is like ride bike: keep muving or yu fall down 11. biz is simpel...yuz other folks munee (Alex Dumas) 12. biz is war & sport (Andree Maurois) 13. bizman is judjed bi if him keep the kumpanee solvent 14. bizman keep skoer with munee [how much $ him make](Noland Bushnel) 15. bizman liv for 4 p's...pae, perks, power, presteej (T Boon Pikens) 16. bizman make goods, make trubel, or make xkuezes (H V Adolt) 17. biz men akt tugether tu flees yu (Abe Linkoln) 18. bizness at hand=stik tu the subjekt, werk on this problem 19. competishun bring out the best in produkts, the baddest in folks (David Sarnof) <****>biz 20. corporation=devise tu make munee without responsabilitee (Ambrose Beers) 21. devote self tu biz, neglekt other thangs (Robert l Stevensun) 22. dissatisfied kustomers R yer best lerning soers (Bill Gates) 23. drive yer biz or it will drive yu (Ben Franklin) 24. eet & drink with kin. Du biz with straenjers. 25. evree man hav biz & want, such as it is (Shakespeer) [dont ask me wot it meen] 26. evree man konsume & otta produes (Ralf W Emersun, 1850) 27. get me a bordroom & i'll get em tu deside mi wae (Alan Bond) 28. half mi ad munee is waested, but me dont no wich half (Jon Wanamaker) 29. hardest part av biz is tu mind yer oen biz <****>biz 30. hire character, traen skill (Peter Schutz) 31. I dont want an uptern, I want mi idiotik kompetiters tu go broke (Joe Bamford) 32. I like tu plae the part av a biz man. Bland, kruel, nonkompetent...natural for me (Jon Klees) 33. if advertizing dont werk, evreethang els is akademik (Will Bernbach, 1950) 34. in biz, dont steel, cheet (Ambrose Beers, 1900) 35. in this biz, trust is not in the vokabularee (Kim Basinger) 36. insest tween biz & guvt thrive in the dark (Jak andersun) 37. kriminal=predater without the kapital tu make a korporashun (Howard Skot) 38. management wont rekonize a good idea unless yu hire a good salesman tu present it (David Ogilvee) 39. so many kount kosts, so fyu gaej value <****>biz 40. sum thank biz is a predatory tiger yu shood shuet, others a kow tu milk, not nuff see it as a helthy werk hoers (Winston Churchil) 41. tell folks profit=inkum - outgo. This make yu look smart (Skot Adams) 42a the biz av the kuntree is biz (Kalvin Koolidge) b the cheef biz av Amerika folks is biz (Kalvin Kueleej) 43. the gambel kalled biz looks askant at the biz av gambeling (Ambrose Beers) 44. the kustomer pae yer wage (Henree Ford) 45. theers no biz like sho biz, but akkounting kum kloes (David Letterman) 46. tu err is not kumpanee polasee 47. wen 2 men in biz alwaes agree, 1 is not needed (Will Wriglee) 48. yu kan fool all the folks all the time if yu advertise rite & budget nuff $ (Joe Levine) 49. yu kant run a biz without rish (Millard Drexler) 237. bizee... (busy in krat speek) 1. 2 bizee duing good, kant find time tu be good 2. 2 fukkin bizee & vise versa (Dorthy Parker) [reply tu editer hu asked wen she wood get dun with promised werk] 3. ants R so bizee...how du em find time tu gotu all pikniks? (Maree Dresler) 4. bizee as a 1-ied man at a burlesk sho 5. bizee as a bee 6. bizee bee dont hav time tu be sad (Will Blake) 7. bizee folks dont hav time for bizee-bodees 8. bizee life is barren (Sokrates) 9. bizee livin or diein (Steev King) bizee 10. bizee man hav 1 devil, idel man hav 1000's (Spaen) 11. bizee man seldun chaenj his pinyun (Fred Nietzche) 12. bizee persun never no how much him wae (Ed How) 13. bizeeer than a 1-armed paper hanger 14. du nuthang is gooder than bizee duing nuthan (Tzu) 15. freendship requier more time than bizee man kan spare (Ralf W Emersun) 16. if yu want sumthang dun, ask a bizee persun (Luseel Ball) 17. I'm 2 bizee thanking bout self tu be modest (Edith Sitwell) 18. I'm 2 bizee tu gro old (Andree Maurois) 19. kapitalism=guvt av the bizee, bi the bossy, for the bully (Arthur Seldon) bizee 20. life is a seerees av bizee nuthangs (Jane Austen) 21. no mater how bizee yu thank yu R, set aside time tu reed (Konfushus) 22. not nuff tu be bizee. Ants R bizee. Wot for? (Henree D Thoro) 23. nowon 2 bizee tu talk bout how bizee him be 24. pretend tu be bizee is hard werk 25. sukses kum tu him hu dont look for it (Henree D Thoro) 26. suksesful folks thank up thangs tu keep evreewon els bizee (Don Marquees) 27. sum no how tu alwaes look bizee & thank that make em non-dispensabel (Kin Hubbard) 28. the bizee dont hav time for teers (Lord Byron) 29. the bizee R happy (Dorthee Dix) 30. wen sumwon ask if yu kan duit, sae yes. Then get bizee & figger out how (Theodor Roosevelt) 238. bizee beever...(slang for sumwon hu werk all the time) also...bizee bee, bizee gie 239. blak... 1. blak as pitch 2. blak as the aes av spades 3. blak hole(modern astrofisiks)=so much mass, nuthang kan get out 4. blak market dont hav komplaent dept 5. blak sheep av the famlee...the won hu alwaes get in trubel 6. blakball=exklude sumwon, oft meen spred bad fawls rumers bout x 240. blame... 1. b4 yu blame, tri tu thank up an exkuez (Jorj Lichtenberg) 2. bad werkman alwaes blame his tools 3. blame is for god & small kids (Dustin Hofman) 4. blame is lazee man's wage (Dane) 5. blame is safer than praes (Ralf W Emersun) 6. blame the werld or blame self 7. blis depend on wot yu blame (Alexander Pope) 8. dont be a blame throer (greg Hikman) 9. dont blame or praes self blame 10. dont blame the viktum, blame the kauz (Theodor Roosevelt) 11. dont make exkueses, make good (Elbert Hubbard) 12. eezeeest thang tu find...fault 13. find fault is eezee, du better is hard (Plutarch, 100ad) 14. fix the problem, not the blame (Katherin Pulsifer) 15. good leeder take more than his share av the blame & less av the kredit (Jon C Maxwell) 16. I asked "wi me?". Vois sed: nuthang persunal, yuer number kame up (Charlee Brown, Peenuts) 17. if yu kik the won responsabel for yer trubels, yu wont sit for a month 18. if yu smile wen thangs go rong, yu plan tu blame sumwon 19. if yu take kredit for the raen, be redee tu get blamed for the dri spell (Dwite Morro) blame 20. its terrabel if yu kant blame sumwon (Erika Jong) 21. Luk is alwaes tu blame (Jeen dela Fontain) 22. man blame fate, but take kredit for a hole-n-1 (Martha Bekman) 23. man blame much more than him praes (Arnold Bennit) 24. man mae fall many times. Tu be a faelyure, yu gotta sae sumwon pushed yu (Elmer G Letterman) 25. praes loud, blame soft (Katherin the grate (Russya)) 26. serch for blame alwae sukseed (Robert Half) b. the serch for sumwon tu blame is alwaes a sukses 27. sum blame gods, stars, planets, witches, bad aer, bile, vapers.... (Peter L Allen) 28. superyer man blame self, inferyer blame others (Don Shula) 29. take yer life in yer hands. Terribel thang happen...nowon tu blame (Erika Jong) blame 30. tu err is human, tu blame next gie is even more human 31. wotever side I take, I will get blamed (Luis 14, 1700) 32. xpert...sumwon kalled in at last minut tu share the blame (Sam Ewing) 33. yer a faelyer wen yu blame sumwon els (Charles Jones) b. yu fael wen yu blame others 34. yu mae fael many times. Yer a faelyer wen yu blame sumwon els (Jon Burros) 241. blankety-blank 242. blarney stone...from Irish Lord Blarney, 1602=gift for gab Him promised much, but never did NE-thang him promis 243. blasfamee is mi hobby 244. blaze... 1. blaze trael=mark the trael 2. go out in a blaze av glory (Dryden, 1686)=make big flash wen yu go 245. bless... 1. Bless yer little pee pikking hart 2. blessed is him hu dont spekt nuthan, him will never be disappointed (Ben Franklin) 3. blessed is him hu go around in serkels, for him shall be kalled wheel 4. blessed is him hu kan laff at self, for him will alwaes be amused. 5. blessed is the peesmakers for em shall be kalled suns av god (Mathyu) 246. blind... 1. Blind as a bat 2. Blind faeth will get yu killed (Brues Springfeeld) 3. blind in 1 ie & kant see out the other 4. blind leed the blind...the leeder dont no NE-more than the folloers if the blind leed the blind, all fall in ditch (Matthu) him also quoted Jesus as saeing "blind leeders leed the blind" 5. I hate blind dates...em keep bumping intu thangs 247. blo... 1. blo a raspberry=sho kontemmpt 2. blo hot & kold =keep chaenjing yer mind 3. blo the wissel= expose bad deed or tern in sumwon tu the kops 4. blo yer stak=temper trantrum 5. blo yer top =get mad, luze yer temper, go ballistik, hit the seeling 6. blo yer trumpet=boest 7. bloed tu smitheerens 248. blond jokes... see also...bimbo 1. wi did the blond klimb the glass wall? tu see the other side 2. wi did the blond krash on landing? run wae oenlee 50ft long (& 1 mile wide) 3. wotz a blond in the kloset? hide & seek champion. 4. wotz a smart blond? gold retriever 249. blood... 1. blood av marters is the seed av the Cherch (Tertullian, 200ad) 2. blood is thiker than water...kinfolk stik tugether 3. blood on the karpet...sumwon got fired, management shakeup 4. blood rule histree (Musolini, 1900) 5. blood will tell ("breeding", ie nobel blood) 6. pees is good, but yu gotta spil blood tu get it (Andru Jakson) 7. pint av swet save gallon av blood (Patton) 8. The sivil sord is red & bloody (Martin Luther, 1520) 9. yung blood gotta run its koers & evree dog hav its sae (Charles Kingslee, 1870) 250. bloopers klik heer tu gotu bloopers
see also bad predikt bimbo (Dum blond) bumper stikkers deth bed werds dum...zampels english goofs faemus last werds funnee insults jokes
kort funnee silly laws moron naeshun trate nok-nok jokes rednek jokes riddels sarkasm shop sine toomstone wi did the chicken kross the roed? wot du yu get wen yu kross
251. blue... 1. blue-blood=aristokrat 2. blue chip =hi stakes, hi value, lotta munee 3. blue moon...original fraze for sumthang unkommon, almost never happen Moon is never "blue", but after vokano put lotta dust in aer, it kan seem bluish Guvt now define "blue moon"=2nd full moon in a month this happen bout evree 13th month 4. blue ribbom=the best 252. blush.. 1. Man is the oenlee kreechuer that blush, or need tu (Mark Twaen) 252. Body... 1. a room without books is like a body without a sole (Cicero, 50bc) 2. body bi Fisher, braens bi Mattel 3. inside this body is a skinny girl, but I shut up her with choklut 253. Boelegged... (bow-legged) 1. she's so boelegged, her hafta get outta bed tu tern over 2. she's so boelegged, em hang her over the door for good luk 254. Bold... 1. Bold is a mask for feer (Jon Driden) 2. forchun faver the bold (Baltasar Gracian) 255. Bolt... 1. Bolt from the blue=kompleet sprize (surprise) 2. shot yer bolt=yu tried evreethang, out av ammo 256. Bone... 1. Bone av kontenshun=sumthang yu fite over (like dogs fite over a bone) 2. Bone up=study, kram 3. Bony Moroney 257. book... 1. a book is a book even if nuthang init (Lord Bryon, 1800) 2. a book is like a garden in the pokket (Chineez) 3. a book is nu tu yu no matter how old it is (Will Hazlit, 1820) 4. a book not reeded is a ded book (Umberto Eko) 5. a book shood be a ball av lite in yer hand (Erza Pound) 6. a book tern it bak on yu, but is stil yer freend 7. a good book hav no end (R D Kumming) 8. a man shood reed wot him like. If it is a chore, it wont du no good (Sam Jonson, 1770) 9. a room without books is like a body without a sole (Cicero, 50bc) book 10. book av life start with 1 man & 1 woman in a garden. it end with revelashuns (Oskar Wild) 11. book av quotes is never kompleet (Robert hamilton) 12. book terned intu muvee is like ox terned intu buyyyun kube (Jon leKarr) 13. books most admired=wot nowon reed (Anatole Frans, 1920) 14. books R paeshent teechers (Charles Eliot) 15. bout that book me loned yu... sorry, i loned it tu a freend. Du yu want it bak. not for me. The gie I borroed it from sed the oener look for it. 16. Dont join the book berners (D D Eisenhower) 17. Dont praes a book just kauz yu made it thru it (Ed Forester, 1950) 18. from the moment I piked up yer book I was konvulsed with laffing. sumdae I plan tu reed it (Grocho Marx) 19. I reed the nuzpaper bekauz it is the best fikshun (Aneurin Bevan, 1940) book 20. I reeded yer book & much like it (Moses Hadas, 1950) [him sae him reeded many books like it...impli all R trash] 21. In siens, reed the nuest, in literacher, reed the oldest (Ed Lyton, 1850) 22. It was a book b4 a muvee 23. Let blokheds reed wot blokheds rite (lord Chesterfeeld, 1760) 24. Martha: is yer husband a book worm? girl: no, just an averaej worm 25. Mi best freend is him hu get me a book I havnt reeded (Abe Linkoln) 26. Most books R forgot aft 1 yeer, xtra so for em hu borroed it (Evan Esar) 27. Most books tudae seem rited overnite from a book him reeded the dae b4 (Seaschun Chamfort, 1780) 28. never judj a book bi its muvee (J W Eegan) 29. Paperbak books will never replaes hard kuver...it make a poor doorstop (Alfred Hitchkok) book 30. Reed much, but not many books (Ben Franklin) 31. Reed tu liv (Gustave Flaubert, 1860) 32. Reeding is a grate pleshuer av solitude (Harold Bloom) 33. Reeding make a full man (Ben Franklin) 34. sum books leev us free, sum make us free (Ralf W Emersun, 1860) 35. sum books R tu be tasted, sum tu swallo, a fyu tu digest (Fransis Bakon, 1600) 36. thanks for the kopee av yer book. I'll waest no time reeding it (Moses Hadas) [I wont waest time tu reed it] 37. this book fill a much needed gap (Moses Hadas) sarkasm...him du book revyues, him impli him yuze book as a door stop 38. The kuvers av this book R tu far apart (Ambrose Beers) 39. The oldest books R nu if yu havnt reeded em (Sam Butler, 1660) book 40. The werth av a book is how much yu get outta it (James Bries) 41. tu lern tu reed is tu lite a fire (Vikter Hugo) 42. tudae a reeder, tumorro a leeder (W Fusselman) 43. with sum books, the kuver is the best part (Charles Dikens, 1850) 44. wot yu ree wen yu dont hafta determin wot yu will be wen yu kant help it (Oskar Wild) 45. yu kan liv many lifes reeding books (Will Styron) 46. yu kant judj a book bi the muvee 258. boot is on the other foot=tabels terned, thangs reversed, top-dog is down 259. booz, boose (krat vershun) 1. buez is the anser. Wotz the quesshun agin? 260. bore... (boredom in krat speek) 1. a bore open his mouth and put his feets [deeds] init (Henree Ford) 2. biggest krime is tu be a bore. 2nd is tu be bored (Secil Beeton, 1950) 3. bore...him talk wen yu keep triing tu interrupt 4. bore...wen yu ask him how him is, him tell yu (Bert Taeler) 5. bore=him hu talk but dont sae (Ben Disraeli) 6. bore=person hu talk wen yu want him tu listen (Ambrose Beers) 7. bore=sumwon hu talk wen yu wanna (Ambrose Beers, 1900) 8. bore open his mouth & put his feets init (Henree Ford) [feets=deeds] 9. bore rap 1-minut idea intu 1-hr vokabulary lessun (Walter Winchel bore 10. bored is emptee insistens (Leo Stein) 11. boredum=evreethang is a waest av time. Serenity=nuthang is. (Tom Szasz) 12. boredum gro wen yu feel safe (Eugeen Ionesko) 13. boredum kill more av life than war (Norman Maeler) 14. bores bore eech other & dont lern form it (Don Marquis, 1900) 15. bores deprive yu av solitude & dont provide kumpanee (Gian Gravina) 16. curiosity kyuer boredum. No kyuer for curiosity (Dorthy Parker) 17. dont bore self (Gerald Brenan) 18. eech yeer a bore konsume 150% av his wate with our paeshens (Jon Updike) 19. em with the leest tu sae talk the most (Mathue Prior, 1700) bore 20. evree imprueved kommunikashun make bores more terribel (Frank Kolbee) 21. evreewon bore sumwon (J A Spenser) 22. feer av boredum kauz 50+% av sin (Bertran Russel) 23. his short kumming is his long staeing (Luis Luisson) 24. humans R the biggest bores (H L Mencken) 25. I spent a yeer in that town 1 Sundae (Warwik Deep, 1920) 26. I'm not bored, just lest overstimulated than norm 27. In the modern aej, bores replaes dragons (Ben Disraeli, 1850) 28. Modern kommunikashuns make it harder tu exkape from bores (Frank Kolbee) 29. nuthang is badder than boredum (Mignon McLaughlin, 1966) bore 30. sum bores waest me 24 hrs in 5 minuts (Jules Renard) 31. sum stae longer in 1 hr than others in a week (Will Howells) 32. sumwon hu talk wen yu wanna (Ambrose Biers) 33. the devils name is dullness (Robert E Lee, 1860) 34. the kyer is kerrositee. Theer iz no kyer for kerrositee (Dorthee Parker) 35. tu be a bore, tell evreethang (Voltare) 36. tu get bored, insult self (Jules Renard) 37. wen yu ask him how him be, him tell yu (Bert Taeler) 38. werk is less a bore than tu tri tu find sumthang tu brake the boredum 39. werk kyuer boredum (Duk de Levis) 261. born... see also...birth 1. AT&T fired president Jon Walter. em klaem him 2 dum tu be leeder. em pae him 26,000,000$ tu go. Maby the bord av direkters is dum 2. 2. born tu be wild, liv tu outgro it (Doug Horton) 3. born with a silver spoon in his mouth=alwaes lived in luxury 4. I am glad I was born (Ovid) 5. I was born at a very erlee aej (Groucho Marx) 6. I was born under a star that dansed (Shakespeer, Much adu bout nuthan) 7. man is full-born oenlee wen ded (Ben Franklin) 8. sum leeders R born wemen (UN press releez) 9. we R born week, helpless, foolish (Jeen Rousso) 10. wen I was born, I was so sprized I didnt talk for a yeer (Grasee Allen) 11. yu was born in a merry our (Shakespeer) 262. borro... 1. b4 yu borro munee from a freend, deside wich yu need more (Joe More) 2. better tu gotu bed hungree than borro (Ben Franklin) 3. borro from a pesamist. Him wont spekt tu get it bak 4. fast tu borro, slo tu pae 5. go a borroing, go a sorroing (R Tanever, 1545) 6. if yu wanna no the value av munee, tri tu borro sum (Ben Franklin) 263. Bosom buddy 264. Boss... 1. mi boss is a ju karpenter 265. bottom... 1. bottom av the barrel=the dregs, gunk 2. bottom fell out=sharp drop, stok market krash 3. bottom line=end result, the profit, net result 4. bottom out =ben dropping for sum time but now look like it is at the bottom 5. bottomless pit=it soke up evreethang & no sine av progress 6. bottoms up=drink it all 7. I started werkin at the bottom. Ben werkin mi bottom ever sins 266. bout as kleer as mud 267. boy...
see also father kids mother parent
1. Boy:nois with dirt onit 2. Boy: i got a part in the skuel plae...the part is a man maeried 20 yrs. father: thats a good start sun, maby next time yu will get a speeking part. 3. Boy: mom bakked outta the garage & ran over mi bike. father: thats wot yu get for leev it on the lawn. 4. Boy was that a nu rinkel 5. boys make good pets 6. boys will be boys, & a lotta old men duit tu (Kin Hubbard) 7. that boy was as werthless as rubber lips on a woodpekker (Erl Pits) 8. wen boy gro, him hav wolf in belly (Jerman) 268. boyfreend/girlfreend... 1. ask wot yu want. subtel hint dont werk. strong hint dont werk. obveeus hint dont werk. 2. Christ Kolumbus found Amerika without direkshuns from his girl. Same heer. 3. if it itch, we skratch 4. if sumthang I sed kan be interpreted several waes, chuez the best wae, not the baddest. 5. if we ask "wotz rong?" & yu sae "nuthang", so be it. 6. if yu hav a problem, kum tu me oenlee if yu want a solushun. if yu want simpathee, gotu girlfreends. 7. if yu thank yu R fat, dont ask 8. men kan oenlee see 16 kolers. Peech is not a koler Mauve...is that a nu theeree bout spaes warp? 9. NE-thang I sed 30 yeers ago is not part av tudae's argument. 10. shopping is not a sport. Definetely NOT partisapashun sport. 11. tu kri=blakmael 12. "yes" and "no" R good ansers 13. yu kan ask us or tell us tu duit. Dont tell us how. if yuno how, duit self. 269. braen... 1. a braen is like a frate kar...has lotta room, but is oft emptee 2. a handful av pasens is werth more than a bushel av braens (Dutch) 3. an open mind is good, but not so open yer braen fall out (Arthur Sulzberger) 4. braen dont kum with garantee 5. braen draen=all the smart wons leev 6. braen like a BB in a boxkar 7. braen yuze 250 M&Ms a dae (based on kalorees it bern)(Harpers) 8. braens R better than brawn 9. it take a wunderful braen + xquisit sens tu make dum ideas (Jorj Santayana) 10. leev that tu mi pal, him the braens av the outfit. wot du that make yu? an eezekkutiv 11. nacher hate a vakyuem. Wen the hed lak a braen, nacher fill it with konseet. 12. Nowon kan nok out his braen kauz him dont hav won (Shakespeer) 13. sum men make a enamee av theer mouth which steel awae theer braen (Shakespeer) 14. The braen is werthless for profeshunal werk (Mark Twain) 270. brag... 1. I brag for human kind, not for me (Henree D Thoro, 1750) 2. if yu kant brag bout wot yu no, brag that yu dont no (Ralf W Emersun) 271. brake... see also...broke 1. brake a leg=good luk (sho biz oenlee) 2. brake a mirrer & yu get 7 yeers bad luk 3. brake the bank=win lotta munee 4. brake the ies=start em talking 5. I koodnt fix yer brakes, so I made the horn louder 6. Wi did yu brake intu song? koodnt find the kees. 272. brand nu=nu, spotless...originally meen fresh outta the fire 273. brave... 1. be brave, but not bravado (Menander) 2. sum R brave bedauz em R afraed tu run awae (Tom Fuller) 3. it is eezee tu be brave wen far awae from danjer (Aesop, 600bc) 274. bred & Serkus...Roman brass tri tu plakate the masses 275. breed is stronger than pascher (Jorj Eliot, 1760) [jeens override environment in modern krat speek] 276. breef... (short) (brevity in krat speek) 1. breef is the hard av inspired (Jorj Santayana) 2. brevitee is eloquent (Mark Cicero, 50bc) 3. brevitee is the sole av linjerie (Dorthy Parker) 4. brevitee is the sole av wit (Shakespeer, 1600) 5. dont yuze 2 werds wen 1 will du (Tom Jeffersun) 6. him sed "I will be breef, im dun" (Ed Wilsun) 7. short is 2 times as good (Baltzar Gracian, 1650) 8. short praer is gooder (Martin Luther, 1500) 9. The more yu sae, the less em remember (Fransis Nelsun, 1700) 10. Werds hav power if yu dont yuze tu many (Josh Billings) 277. breth... 1. bad breth is goofer than no breth 278. bridj... (bridge in krat speek) 1. bridj over trubeled water 2. water under the bridy=in the past, best forget it 3. we'll kross the bridj wen we get tuit 279. bring home the bakon (werk tu feed the famlee) 280. Brit... in 1890 British Navy was equal tu kombine av #2 & #3. Hu was em? Frans & Rushya in 1900 British Navy was equal tu kombine av #2 & #3. Hu was em? Jermanee & USA 280. Brite... 1. brite as a nu silver dollar 2. Brite ied & bushy taeled=alive 281. Britin is the oenlee kuntree weer the food is more danjerus than sex (Jak Mason) 282. brodminded... 1. brodminded=himinded chaenjed bi speereeans 2. opra not over til fat brod sing (Washington Post, 13 Jun 1978) 283. Broke... 1. if it aent broke, dont tri tu fix it. 2. if it aent broke, Leroy has not yet tried tu fix it 3. mi broker kalled & sed weer broke 4. wot keep yu broke...not the wolf at the door, its the silver fox in the windo. 284. Broom... 1. mi wife's other kar is a broom 2. nu broom sweep kleen, old brush no the korners 285. Brother... 1. a brother is a freend bi nacher (Jeen B Legouv) b. brother=freend naechur giv yu 2. a freend is a brother hu was wons a bother 3. big brother watch yu (Jorj Orwell, book "1984") 4. brother is freend god gave yu; freend=brother yer hart chuez 5. brothers R like sisters hu like bugs 6. him that shed blood with me is mi brother (Shakespeer) 7. if yu wanna no how her will treet yu, listen tu how her talk tu her littel brother (Sam Levenson) 8. if yu want a puppy, beg for a baby brother. Em will settel for the puppy (Winston Pendelton) 9. man is yer brother. If yu persakute him, yer a monster (Voltaer) 10. sot mi sole , kood not see sot mi god , eluded me sot mi brother, got all 3 11. take 2 men tu make 1 brother (Israel Zangwill) 12. wen sister is groed up, litter brothers bekum big brothers (Astrid Ortega) 13. wen theer R no ties tu bind men, em R not brothers (Antoine Saint-Exupery) 286. Brown... 1. Brown as a berry 2. Brown noeser 287. Brownee points (atta-boy, good boy) 1. Brownees=girl equiv av kub skouts. Hav a point gage tu rate how eech girl did thus a brownee point=1 good mark for yu warning...1 aw-shit wipe out 1000 brownee points 288. bubbel 1. men in bubbel & mobs akt tugether without thank. Eech kum bak tu his senses 1 bi 1. 288. budget... (budjet in non-krat) 1. balans budget not as bad as budget the balans 2. budget: a wae tu go broke with purpus rigerus proof yu kant liv in yer inkum tell yer munee weer tu go insted av wunder weer it went the outkum av the inkum depend on the outgo av the upkeep wot yu kan stae in if yu du without 3. budget=du without tu stae inside 4. budget=kut spend (Laurens Bukman) 5. budget=math konfirm yer dreds (or suspishuns) (A A Latimer) 6. budget is a wae tu weree bout munee b4 yu hafta b. weree b4 yu spend it on top av weree aft yu spend it 7. If unkel Sam kant balans the budget, hes not so smart 8. kan yu balans the budget bi add & subtrakt? 9. the nashunal budget must be balansed the kommon man must lern tu werk (Sisero, in 55 bc) 10. the problem with a budget is...tu fill 1 hole, yu dig anuther (Dan Benet) 289. bug... 1. bug-ied monster (reel spaes aleeun) 2. sum daes yu R the bug, sum daes the windsheeld 290. buk... (slang for dollar) 1. bukaroo=slang for kowboy, maby from Mex werd for kowboy (vaquero) 2. I wished the buk stop heer...I kood yuze sum 3. the buk stop heer (Harry S Truman) 291. bull... 1. bull=hogwash=krap=false=rong=wot guvt sae=full av it 2. bull hedded=stubborn, pig hedded 3. like a bull in a china shop (rekless) 4. wen yer full av bull, keep mouth shut 292. Bullet... 1. bite the bullet 2. him hu fire bullet in the aer dont no weer it will land 292. Bumbelbee dont no it kant fli, so it duit NE-wae 293. Bump on a log 294. Bumper stikker... 1. 2 tipes av walkers...fast & ded 2. 3 tipes av folks ...em hu kan kount & the others 3. a dae without sunshine is...nite 4. a fool & his munee...girls best freend 5. a waest is a terribel thang tu mind 6. abandon yer serch for truth, settel for dreems 7. alkohol...If yu wanna drink all dae, gotta start erlee in the morn dont drink & drive, yu mite spill yer beer dont drink & park...akseedents kauz kids for instant asshole, add alkohol Im drunk, not alkoholik. Alkoholiks gotu meetings. rehab is for quitters 8. all jenralizashuns R fawls 9. all men R idiots & I wed the king bumper stikker 10. all stressed out & nowon tu choke 11. amnesia yuzed tu be mi favorit werd 12. anamals... Ask me bout how tu mikrowave kats for fun & profit Dont bother the dragon, yer krunchee & good with ketchup dont plae leepfrog with Yunikorns Just wen yu thot yu was ahed in the rat raes...along kum faster rats 13. avoid hangovers, stae drunk 14. bartemder=druggist wit limited repatore 15. be kind tu anamals...hug a hokkee plaer 16. be the kind av freend yu wood want 17. blond... Aliens eet skinny blonds first I'm not drunk, I'm blond not all dums R blond wen blonds hav more fun, du em noit? with byuteeful blond haer, wi did yu die the roots blak? 18. body bi Fisher, braens bi Mattel 19. boldly go noweer...weer evreewon ben b4 bumper stikker 20. born free, taxed tu deth 21. breeding... 100,000,000,000 sperm sells & yu was fastest? firefiters...we find em hot & leev em wet how kum yer not ded? I dont date outside mi speesees I faeled sex, need tuter I hav a sex transmitted dazeez...kids I need sumwon reel bad, R yu reel bad? If a kupel in Kentuk divors, R em still brother & sister? If yer hot, kall me tunite If yer notty, gotu yer room. If yu wanna be, gotu mine. If yu kant feed em, dont breed em Jeen pool kood yuze more chlorine kids in front seet kauz akseedents. Akseedent in bak seet kauz kids. lern from yer parents mistake...yuze birth kontrol sex is a sex-transmitted dazeez that is alwaes fatal stop inbreeding...ban kuntree muzik thanks for not breeding, next time dont breeth tu all virjins...thanks for nuthang yer so notty, gotu mi room yer the result av 10,000,000 yeers av evolushun? yu...outta the jeen pool 22. byutee is in the ie av the beer holder 23. dare tu get kops off donuts 24. did yu laff at a jeep tudae? 25. dont blame me, I voted for the other krook 26. dont drink & drive...yu mite spill yer beer 27. dont get so kloes, I'm not that kind av kar 28. dont regret wot yu du, regret wen sumwon katch yu 29. dont take mi signals seereeus bumper stikker 30. dont take the tern-lites seereeus 30. dont wash...this is a sientifik dirt test 31. drive... 0 tu 60 in 15 minuts <--- pass side, suiside ---> beem me tu werk skotty, traffik suk dont drink & drive, yu mite spil yer beer dont honk 2 loud, yu mite wake up the driver dont thank & drive drive defensiv, bi a tank drive it like yu stold it drive offensiv...get em b4 em get yu driver asleep faster than a speeding tikket forget werld pees...tri tu visyulize a tern signal get in. sit down. shutup. hang on. go ahed, I'll get yu at the next stop lite hang up...thats a kar, not a fone booth 31. drive (kont) hang up & drive horn broke, watch for finger how wood yu drive the kar with yer fone up yer ass? I drive like this tu pis yu off I drive over wannabees I hit walkers at random if yu oenlee yu wood drive as perfekt as me if yu dont like mi driving, stae off the sidewalk if yu kan reed this, I got yu weer I want yu...behind me if yu thank I'm a lowzee driver, waet til yu see me putt Im sorry if I drive 2 kloes in front av yu kids drive me krazee, I drive em evreeweer kleer the roed, I'm 16 kuver me, I'm gonna chaenj lanes life is short, drive fast next time, wave more than 1 finger mi karma drive over yer dogma no hurry...I'm on the wae tu werk speed like litening, krash like thunder stop reeding bumper stikers & get yer mind on the roed student driver...kleer the hiwae this is how we spend our kids inheritans this is not speeding, its a qualifi run 31. drive (kont) warning...bak seet driver warning...driver appli makeup at random times warning...I drive at the speed limit warning...I drive like yu wi du me be the oenlee persun on erth that no how tu drive? Yes, I du oen the roed 32. drive like hell...yu'll get theer faster 33. drive like yu stoled it 34. driver dont hav kash...wife hav it all 35. dum is not a krime, so yer free tu go 36. erth...the madhous av the yunivers 37. erth is full, go home 38. fite krime...shuet bak 39. fliing sausers R reel, Aer Foers is not bumper stikker 40. for a small town, so many asshoes 41. forget werld pees, tri tu figger out how tu signal yer terns 42. giv me ambiguity, or sumthang els 43. god...pleez save me from yer folloers 44. gon krazee, be bak tumorro 45. hang up & drive 46. him hu hesitate...is lost & miles from next exit 47. honk if NE-thang fall off (sumthang fall off) 48. honk if yu hate nois 49. honk if yu kant reed this bumper stikker 50. honk if yu kant reed this 50. honk if yu luv pees & quiet 51. honk if yu want, I'm reloeding now 52. honk tu see finger 53. horn broke, watch finger 54. how deep wood the see be without the sponges init? 55. how du I set mi lazer tu stun? 56. I brake for skolers, preests, & no apparent reesun 57. I didnt luze mi mind...hav a bakup kopee on dik sumweer 58. I didnt luze mi mind, I sold it 59. I dont suffer from madness...I like evree minut av it bumper stikker 60. I dont werree wen I get lost, I chaenj weer I wanna go 61. I drive like this tu piss yu off 62. I drive the speed limit. If yu dont like it, kall a kop 63. I fited the lawn & it won 64. I get mi xersize bi push mi luk 65. I got a nu kar for mi wife...best trade I ever made 66. I had a handel on life, but it broke 67. I hav the body av a god...Budda 68. I thank yu left the water on...better go bak & chek 69. I took an IQ test, the result was negativ bumper stikker 70. I took the drive test & the result was negativ 71. I was disgusted at first, now i'm amuzed 72. I wood kill for a Nobel pees prize 73. if yu dont chaenj yer mind, how du yuno yu hav 1? 74. if yu smoke after sex, slo down & kool off 75. if yu kan reed this, mi traeler kame lues 76. I'm kruel & hartless & good at it 77. I'm not drunk...I dont no how tu drive 78. I'm not a kompleet idiot ...sum parts missing 79. I'm not def...i'm ignoring yu bumper stikker 80. I'm on a 1-dae pass, then gotta go bak in 81. It is as bad as it seem ...em reellee R out tu get cha 82. Its a kar, not a fone booth 83. Its loenlee at the top, but yu eet more 84. Its not polite tu stare 85. jeen pool kan yuze more chlorine 86. join the army, meet stranjers, kill em 87. kar... 98% av fords R still on the roed, rest made it home BMW...big munee waest Chevrolet...cheep, hardy, efishent, virtually run on luk evree time dont follo...I dont no weer I wanna go dont kleen...potatoes kummin up in bak seet dont laff ...its paed for dont laff ...yer mom mae be in heer eet mi dust FIAT...fix it agin, Tony FORD...bakward...driver retern on foot FORD...fix or repaer daelee FORD...found on roed ded FORD...fukked over rebilded Dodj hiwae not big nuff for 2 av us I oenlee ride the best if not for kids, this wood be a Mersaedees if this was a hoers, I wood hafta shuet it if yu kant dodj it, ram it if yu value yer life, dont mess with mi truk insured bi maffia...yu hit it, em hit yu it dont leek oil, it mark the wae kar is infekted, dont tuch kar is like husband...mine, dont tuch kar protekted bi pit bull with aids kar will explode if yu hit it kar xplode on kontakt lost yer kat? look under mi tire mi other kar is a 747 mi other kar is a Harlee mi other kar is a pees av krap 2 mi other kar is a UFO mi other ride is yer mom no munee, no steereeo, lotta rust...not werth steelin NOT abandoned Maffia staff kar oenlee jues kum bi the liter oenlee the very sekuer will be seed in a kar like this overterning kar...dont over take PONTIAK...poor old nut thank its a kar puter dezined, robot bilded, moron driver reel Amerikans bi wot em like rust test in progres shuer wish mi wife was as dirty as mi truk this is a sientifik dirt test...dont wash VOLVO...vehikel av lo-speed oeners wen I gro up, I'm gonna be a Kadilak wife's other kar is a broom yes, it stink & giv yu a hedake...Deezel yes, its fast, No, yu kant drive it 88. kareful, blind driver 89. keep honking, I need time tu reloed bumper stikker 90. kleer konshens make soft pillo 91. kleptomaniak? take sumthang for it 92. krime... DARE...drugs R reel xsiting dont hit me, mi lawyer's in jael dont steel, guvt hate kompatishun fite krime, shuet bak I dont beleev in violens, so dont let me kill yu I sae no tu drugs, but nowon listen I sweer the body was ded wen me found it I was framed. I reelee didnt meen tu duit oenlee yuzers luze drugs krime woodnt pae if the guvt ran it take a bite outta krime tresspasers will be shot, survivers prosekuted wi drink & drive wen yu kan smoke & fli? 93. kuver me...I'm gonna chaenj lanes 94. laffing stok...funny kows 95. looks... God made ugly so the rest av us kan get a good laff I mae be fat, but yer ugly. I kan luze wate, yu kant I mae be fat, slo, & ugly, but I'm ahed av yu If yer not pregnant, it not a baby If yu like mi bumper, tri mi hedlites I'm inshape, round is a shape I'm not fat, I'm short for mi wate I'm not konseeted...konseet is a nonperfekshun I'm the fat brod & I dont sing shit life is 2 short tu dans with ugly mi other wife is good lookin 2 yer the rite aej...older 96. lord, make me the person mi dog thank me be 97. lost in thot...never ben heer b4 98. me not def, me just ignore yu & yer horn 99. mi handel on life broke bumper stikker 100. mi kar du 0-60 in 15 minuts 101. mi karma ran over yer dogma 102. mi wife komplaen I dont listen, or sumthang or other 103. mi wife's other kar is a broom 104. NE-1 kan stop smoking. Take a reel man tu handel kanser 105. NE-thang yu sae will be misquoted & yuzed ginst yu 106. nonliterat? rite yer kongresman 107. not all hu wander R lost 108. now that yu kissed the bumper, wanna wed it? 109. nun R virgins...life skru all bumper stikker 110. pae attenshun & drive 111. paranoids hav foes 2 112. praktis safe sex...skru self 113. roer down the roed...I'll see yu at next red lite 114. save waels...kollekt the hole set 115. seed it, did it, dont remember wot 116. sex so good, even the nabers had a sig after 117. she is alwaes late...her ansesters kame on the juneflower 118. shut up & drive 119. so yu thank yer perfekt? lets see yu walk on water bumper stikker 120. sum R still alive oenlee kaus the rest dont hav the gumpshun tu kill em 121. sumtimes I wake up grumpy, sumtimes I let her sleep 122. support yer rite tu bare arms...weer short sleev shirt 123. tell yer girlfreend, I sed thanks 124. the more thangs chaenj, the more em stae non-sane 125. this delinquent du sex with yer oner student 126. this is it...all the kar me hav 127. this kar is not abandoned 128. this kar mae krash or xplode for no reesun 129. tri tu imajin...kerteeus driver bumper stikker 130. tu much blood in mi alkohol pipes 131. USMK...Unkel Sams misgided kids 132. vote for minimum wage...for kongressmen 133. wanted...meeningful overnite relashunship 134. warning...blind driver 135. warning...dates on kalendar R kloeser than it look 136. warning...driver legally blond 137. warning...I brake for the hek av it 138. warning...I swerv & hit at random 139. was his (blond woman in Mersaedees) bumper stikker 140. watch out for the idiot behind me 140. we mae be slo, but we R ahed av yu 141. weer am I going? and wi in this hand-basket? 142. wen seegulls hang round the bae, wi dont we kall em bae-gals 143. wen the chips R down, the buffalo R emptee 144. werk harder...milyuns on welfare depend on yu 145. wi am I the oenlee won on erth hu no how tu drive? 146. wi be redundant? 147. wi du siekeeks ask for yer name? 148. wi du yu keep folloing me? 149. wi is "abbreviashun" so big? bumper stikker 150. yer just jeelus kauz the voises oenlee talk tu me 151. yer kid mae be an oner student, but yer an idiot 152. yer not outraejed? Yu dont pae tenshun 153. yu! outta the jeen pool 154. yu hav the rite tu stae dum 155. yu thank me a louzee driver? waet til yu see me putt 295. burden... 1. dont prae for liter loed, prae for stronger bak (Filip Brooks, 1880) 2. eezeer tu go thru life if yu dont hav tu much on yer bak (Silas Mitchel, 1900) 3. nun no the wate av yer burden (Jorj Herbert, 1630) 296. buree hatchet under tree=make pees 297. burokrat... see also...krat 1. a krat kut red tape sidewaes (J Mckabe) 2. an effishent krat wood be a big thret tu liberty, but theer aent num (Yugeen Mckarthy) 3. best soers av leesure...many assistants 4. blessed is him hu talk in serkels, him shall bekum a big weel (Frank Dane) 5. burokrasee=molasses 6. burokrasee: folks put in plaes em tu put em in theer plaes 7. burokrasee...jiant masheen run bi pigmees (Honore de Balzak) 8. burokrasee...no won rule (Yugeen Mckarthy) 9. burokrat=desk jokkee (Dan Benet) burokrat 10. burokrat: demokrat hu hold offis or republikan that want it (Alben W Barklee) 11. burokrat: the meetloef av humanity 12. burokrat gidelines: wen in charj, ponder wen in trubel, delegate wen in dout, mumbel (James H Boren) 13. burokrat gotta pass the buk or spend it (Mrs Henree J Serwat) 14. burokrat resist chaenj kauz em liv off the kaeos em make (Richard Nixon) 15. burokrat's idea av kleen up yer files=make a kopee av evrethang, then bern all 16. Dont beleev publik rekords (William Blake, 1800) 17. Dont eet this bookkase, it mae hert (Bjorn Baelee)[translated from krat speek] 18. em hu kan du, em hu kant teech, all others bekum krats (Kalvin Kalverlee) 19. god forgiv yu, a krat never (Himan Rikover) burokrat 20. guvt programs never die. guvt buro liv forever (Ronald Raegen) 20. hell hav no fury like skorned burokrat (Milton Freedman) 21. if first person hu anser fone kant anser it, its burokrasee (LBJ) 22. krats gotta dispose av paperwerk, so em dump on us (P J O'Rourk) 23. memo is not tu inform reeder, but tu protekt riter (Deen Acheson) 24. nuthang more permanent than temp guvt job (Jorj Allen) 25. perfekt burokrat: dont make no desishuns & exkape all responsability (Justin B Atkinson) 26. poor fello suffer from files (Aneurin Bevan) 27. sivil servant is faesless mortal hu ride flee on bak av dog=legislashun [laws] 28. the dazeez that inflikt all krats is ruteen (Jon Mill, 1850) 29. the inventer av zerox [av kopee masheen] hav a speshal spot in hell rezerved (Nik Goodisun) burokrat 30. the longer the titel, the less portant the job (Jorj Mcgovern) 31. tri tu deel with burokrasee is like tri tu nael jelly tu the wall (JFK)
business Biz
298. bus... 1. bus=kar that go 2 times as fast wen yu R after it than init 299. bust yer chops=werk hard
busy Bizee
300. butter dont melt in her mouth=her so kold
buy bi
301. byutee... (beauty in krat speek) 1. a thang av byutee is a joy forever (Jon Keets) 2. amazing the delushun byutee is good (Leo Tolstoy) 3. byutee & folly R kompanyons [go tugether] (Baltasar Gracian) 4. byutee & the beest 5. byutee & virtue dont go tugether (Petarch) 6. byutee=woman yu notis, charmer=her notis yu 7. byutee is all sho (Euipides, 420 bc) 8. byutee is as byutee du 9. byutee is in the hart av the beholder (Al Bernstein) byutee 10. byutee is in the ie av the beholder (Tom Overbury, 1610) 11. byutee is in the ie av the beer holder 12. byutee is never perfekt 13. byutee is not the faes, its the hart lite (Kahlil Gibran) 14. byutee is oenlee skin deep 15. byutee is skin deep (Tom Overbury, 1620) 16. byutee is skin deep, uglee go tu the bone (Bloks law) 17. byutee last all yeer, it is good (Tom Adam, 1730) 18. byutee mae be good, good is alwaes byuteeful (Ninon Enklos) 19. byutee pleez the ie. Sweet disposishuhn charm the sole (Voltaer) byutee 20. byutee without graes us giij wutgiyt baet (Ralf W Emersun) 21. byutee without virchu is flower without perfume (French) 22. byuteeful woman...paradise for the ies, hell tu the sole, purgatory tu pers (Bernard Fontenell) 23. evreethang hav byutee, but many dont see 24. true byutee is inside weer nowon will ever see it (David Iskoe) 25. yu dont luv her for her byutee, her byutee is from yer luv top