1413. O...
1. O wot a tangeled web we weev wen we tri tu deseev.(Sir Walter Skot, 1800)
b. tangeled web "wen we praktis deseev"
2. O ye, av little faeth
1414. obae... (obedience in krat speek)
1. a good servant no wich kommands tu not obae (Shakespeer)
2. a grate person lern hu, how, & wen tu obae (Will A Ward)
3. em hu dont no, obae (Jorj Farquar, 1700)
4. obae is gooder than sakrafies (bibel)
5. obae is the doktrin av despots (Angelina Grimk, 1835)
6. obae wot is strongest (Blais Paskal, 1650)
7. oenlee take orders from em hu lerned how tu obae (Will Forster, 1850)
8. progres kum from disobae & rebel (Oskar Wild, 1890)
9. Yuth dont obae
1415. obituary
1. obit rule...nowon hu die is ever bad or meen or ordinary
1415. objekt...
1. inaminate objekts kum in 3 grueps
1. dont werk, 2. broke, 3. lost (Russel Baker)
1416. observ all men, self most (Ben Franklin)
1417. obstakels R skaree thangs wen yu take yer ies off yer goel (Henree Ford)
1418. obstinut man dont hav pinyuns; em hav him (Alex Pope)
1419. odd...
1. Odd man out
2. Odds and ends
3. if yu gotu store for 1 loef av bred,
the odds yu kum out with oenlee that is 3 bilyun tu 1 ginst (Erma Bombek)
1420. oedipus komplex=fixate on mother..based on story bi Sofocels, 430 bc
Oedipus killed his father, then wed his mother, then her kill self.
1421. oenlee... (only in krat speek)
1. oenlee 1 man in a 1000 is a leeder. The other 999 follo wemen (Groucho Marx)
2. oenlee 1 oer in the water...slang for half-wit=dum
3. oenlee 3 thangs hiss...gues, snake, fool. Kum forth & be ideed
4. oenlee dif tween good dae & bad dae is yer attitude (Dennis S Brown)
5. oenlee kyuer for luv is tu wed (Irish)
6. oenlee mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the noondae sun. (India)
7. oenlee thang that interfer with lernin is skuelin (A Einstein)
8. oenlee thang that kum without effort is old aej (Gloria Pitzer)
9. oenlee thang that sit its wae tu sukses is a hen (Sara Brown)
10. oenlee thang we hav tu feer is feer (Franklin D. Roosevelt)
11. oenlee thang without limit is human dumness (Albert Einstein)
12. oenlee thang yu dont regret is yer mistakes (Oskar Wild)
13. oenlee thang yu take with yu wen yer gon is wot yu leev behind (Jon Alston)
14. oenlee the good die yung
15. oenlee the sik no weer it hert
16. oenlee the spoon no wot stir the pot (Sicilee)
17. oenlee the yuzer [or weerer] no weer th shue pinch
18. oenlee time I was in rite plaes at rite time, I got in rong line
19. the oenlee kyuer for birth & deth is hav fun in tween (Jorj Santayana)
1422. off...
1. off his rokker
2. off like an old dirtee shirt
3. off the beet path=go diff wae (a wae less traveled)
4. off the kuff =offhand, without thank
5. off the rekord =brass tell reporter stuff
as long as reporter dont tell hu sed so
6. off the wall
7. off with his hed (Shakespeer)=kill the king
8. off with the old, on with the nu
1423. offend...
1. all grate librarys hav sumthang tu offend evreewon (Jo Goodwin)
2. best defens is offens & me plan tu start offending now (Capt James)
3. free tu offend is part av freedum av expresshun (Salmon Rushdee)
4. I dont offend on purpus (Isaek Watts)
5. I offended god. Mi werk not good nuff (Leonardo da Vinci, 1519)
6. I tri tu not offend God (Elvis Preslee)
7. if a printer tri tu not offend NE-1, him will never print (Ben Franklin)
8. if yer ie offend yu, pluk it out. if yer hand offend yu, kut it off (Bibel)
9. men R apt tu offend wen em shood forgiv (Will Kongreev)
10. modest is the pride leest likelee tu offend (Jules Renard)
11. never offend with stile wen yu kan offend with substans (Tom Brown)
12. raenk villun smell offend the nose (Shakespeer)
13. the sekret av sukses...offend evreewon (Jorj B Shaw)
14. tri tu seek god & not offend the devil (Tom Fuller)
15. wen yu disarm yer subjekts, yu offend em (Nik Machiavelli)
16. yu gotta indulj em or destroy em.
NE-thang els offend em & em get mad & fite yu (Nik Machiavelli)
1424. oh...
1. Oh how time fli wen yu hav fun
2. Oh that wae is madness
1425. oil and water dont mix
1426. ok...
1. okee dokee (long vershun av ok)
1427. old...part 1...skolar quotes bout "old"
1. a man is as old as him feel, a woman as old as her look (Mortimer Kollins)
2. aejing is the oenlee wae tu liv a long life (Danyeel Auber)
3. all dazeezes bekum 1...old aej (Ralf W Emersun)
4. as yu aej, yu get wiser & more foolish at the same time
5. as yu get older, yu dont hafta get old (Jorj Berns)
6. as yu get older, yu stand for more & fall for less
7. bi the time yer 80 yrs old, yuno evreethang.
Problem is tu remember it (Jorj Berns)
8. did it take yu a long time tu get old?
9. did yu stop tu thank & forget tu start agin?
old
10. dont gro old, theers no fyucher init
11. dont regret gro old, its a privledj many dont hav
12. eezeeer tu get old than get wise.
13. exses av yueth borro ginst fyucher.
Gotta pae it bak with interest 30 yrs later (Charles Kolton)
14. first 100 yeers R the hardest (Wilsun Mizner)
15. fortunatelee, yu R NOT as old as yu feel (Russel Baker)
16. gettin old is not for sisees
17. good old daes: wen yu was smarter than yer fone
18. grandma was tuff. Burreed 3 husbands & 2 was just taking a nap (Rita Ruder)
19. gro old is like punish yu for a krime yu didnt du (Tony Powel)
old
20. gro old with me, the best is yet tu kum (Robert Browning)
21. he hav respekt for old aej, xtra so wen its in a bottel (Geen Fowler)
22. how did I get over the hill & never get tu the top?
23. how old wood yu be if yu didnt no how old yu R? (Satchel Paej)
24. I dont du drugs now...I get the same effekt wen I jump up.
25. I dont feel old. I dont feel NE-thang til noon.
Thats time for mi nap (Bob Hope)
26. I dont get old, I get bitter.
27. I get the paper, reed the obityuarees.
If I'm not theer, karry on as yuzyual (Pat More)
28. I'm not old, im a resiekeled teenaejer
29. I'm not old, just ben yung a long time
old
30. I'm not yung nuff tu no evreethang
31. I wanna gro old as slo as possabel (Ireen Selznik)
32. I stae a kereeus kid forever, never gro old (A Einstein)
33. I still hav a full dek, but I shuffel sloer now
34. if yueth noed it, if aej kood (Henri Esteen)
35. in dog yeers, i'm ded
36. inside evree old folk is a yungun hu ask "wot happened"
37. its not how old yu R, but how yu R old (Maree Durel)
38. its not the yeers in yer like but the life in yer yeers (Adli Stevensun)
39. kids R a konfort in yer old aej
& em help yu get theer faster tu (Lionel Kaulfman)
old
40. klassik, jenyuwine anteek. Em dont make em like this NE-more
41. mi bak go out more than me (Fillis Diller)
42. mi mind wander a lot, but dont go far
43. middel aej is wen yu stil thank yu will heel & be as good as ever (Don Marquis)
44. most dont no how tu be old (Fransis Rokforkald)
45. NE-won kan get old. All yu gotta du is liv long nuff (Grocho Marx)
46. old=inkreezing penaltee for a krime me didnt du (Tony Powel)
47. old aej...wen yu yuze 1 bendover tu pik up 2 thangs
48. old aej is a shiprek (Charles deGaul)
49. old aej is a tirant hu forbid yuethful fun (Fransis Rochfouchald)
old
50. old aej is like evreethang els,
tu be good at it, yu gotta start erlee (Theodor Roosevelt)
51. old aej is no plaes for sissees (Bette Davis)
52. old aej kum at a bad time (Sam Banduksi)
53. old aej...mi bak go out more than me (Fillis Diller)
54. old as dirt
55. old as Methuselah
56. old bankers never die, em just luze interest
57. old chestnut=joke, story yu dont beleev
58. old dokters dont die, em just luze theer paeshents
59. old folk tri tu giv good advies
wen em kant serv as a bad zampel (Fransis Rouch)
old
60. old gardeners dont die, em just spade awae
61. old habits die hard
62. old habits hav deep roots.
63. old hat
64. old hav problems nuff without adding vies (Kato, 150bc)
65. old is 15 yeers older than me (Tom Aldrich)
66. old is despised, but evreewon wanna duit
67. old is not bad wen yu konsider the other posabilitee (Maurees Shevalyae)
68. old is uglee & keep gettin badder (Dian Kooper)
69. old is wen old klassmates R so old & rinkeled, em dont rekanize yu
old
70. old klassmates R so rinkeled, grae, & bald...I hardlee reknize em
71. old law stae in foers long aft we kood chaenj it (Aristotel)
72. old nuff tu sleep bi self, yung nuff dont wanna
73. old so-n-so kikked the bukket
74. old programers never die, em just luze theer memree
75. old soldyers dont die, em faed awae (Doug McArthur)
76. old soldyers dont die, yung 1s die
77. old stamping ground
78. old warhoers=speereeansed but old, veteran, retired, otta retire
79. old wifes tale=superstishun
old
80. older than dirt
81. older than father time
82. older than the creek
83. over the hill=middel aej, past yer prime
84. over the hill & pikking up speed
85. over the hill but the klime was grate
86. prefer over-the-hill tu under it
87. push 40 is plenty av xersize
88. sad tu gro old, nies tu ripen (Brigit Bardo)
89. seed it all, herd it all, did it all, but kant remember wen
old
90. so many kandels, so littel kake
91. the oenlee thang we get without effort is old (Gloria Pitzer)
92. the old forget wot the yung dont no
93. the old no more bout be yung than the yung no bout how tu be old
94. the older I get, the gooder I yuzed tu be
95. the older yu get, the better yu R
not if yer a banana
96. the older yu get, the older yu wanna be (Keeth Richards)
97. the suprizing thang bout yung fools
is em survive tu bekum old fools (Doug Larson)
98. the yung soe wild oets, the old gro sage (W. Churchil)
99. tu see how short life is, yu gotta be old
old
100. we are not old, weer resiekeled teens
101. we get heeveer as we get older kauz theer is more in R heds (Vlade Divak)
102. we get older at the same rate, but start at dif aej
103. we pae for yuethful exsesses wen we get old (J B Preestlee)
104. wen I was a boy, the ded see was oenlee sik (Jorj Berns)
105. wen yu bekum seenile, yu wont noit (Bill Krosbee)
106. wen yu get old 3 thangs happen. 1=yer memree go.
I dont remember the other 2. (Norman Wisdum)
107. wen yu R 80 yu lerned evreethang, but kant remember it (Jorj Berns)
108. wen yu stop lernin, yer old (Henree Ford)
109. wons yer over the hill, yu pik up speed (Charles Schultz)
old
110. wotever poet, orater, or sage mae sae, old is still old (Sinklaer Luis)
111. wrinkels on the brow as yu aej is ok, but not on the hart (Garfeeld)
112. yeers teech wot daes didnt no (Ralf W Emersun)
113. yer am old timer if yu kan remember wen
a famlee that lived from paedae tu paedae was "shiftless"
nowadaes, if yu kan duit, yer kalled an xseelent finanshal wizard
114. yer as old as yu feel (Henree Ameel)
115. yer getting old wen the kandels kost more than the kake (Bob Hope)
116. yer getting old wen yu stop lie bout yer aej & brag insted
117. yer getting old wen yu stuep tu tie yer shuestrings
& wunder wot els yu shood du wile down theer (Jorj Berns)
118. yer old wen regrets replaes dreems (Jon Barrymore)
119. yer sprized the first time sumwon kall yu old (Oliver W Holms)
old
120. yu dont stop plaeing kauz yu get old, yu get old wen yu stop plaeing (Tom Lee)
121. yu get older, but yu dont hafta get old (Jorj Berns)
122. yu gotta gro old, dont gotta gro up
123. yu kant tern bak the klok, but yu kan wind it up agin (Bonee Pruden)
124. yu R old wen evrethang is....(kant remember wot me was gonna sae)
125. yu thank it bad that lust & rage ruel mi old aej?
so it was wen me was yung (Will B Yeets)
1428. old aej...
1. 40 is the old aej av yueth, 50 the yueth av old aej (Vikter Hugo, 1880)
2. 50 is niftee
3. all dazeezes bekum 1...old aej (Ralf W Emersun)
4. better tu hav bad breth than no breth
5. dont take the faults av yueth intu old aej. Aej bring nu faults (Jon Goethe)
6. gro old required, gro up...opshunal
7. he hav respekt for old aej, xtra so wen its in a bottel (Geen Fowler)
8. if yuth hav noit [nawledj], if old aej had the strength (French)
9. in old aej yu gotta liv with the freends, helth, & kids yu erned (Fae Welden)
old aej
10. in yueth the daes R short & the yeers long
in old aej, the yeers R short & the daes long (Pope Paul 6)
11. in yueth we run intu problems. In old aej, problem run over us (Beverlee Sils)
12. Kids R a komfort in yer old aej & put yu theer faster 2 (Lionel Kaufman)
13. lern is the best wae tu provide for old aej (Aristotel)
14. memree kut adversity, kontrol yueth,
& delite old aej (Lactanium Ferianus, 330 ad)
15. oenlee thang that kum without effort is old aej (Gloria Pitzer)
16. old aej...mi bak go out more than me (Fillis Diller)
17. old aej...not broke, but bent rather bad
18. old aej...wen yu yuze 1 bendover tu pik up 2 thangs
19. old aej is a shiprek (Charles deGaul)
old aej
20. old aej is a tirant hu forbid yuethful fun (Fransis Rochfouchald)
21. old aej is like bank akkount...yu take out wot yu put in
22. old aej is like evreethang els,
tu be good at it, yu gotta start erlee (Theodor Roosevelt)
23. old aej is no plaes for sissees (Bette Davis)
24. old aej kum at a bad time (Sam Banduksi)
25. old aej snuff out more talent than wars (Gerald Brenan, 1930)
26. old aej take awae wot we inherit & giv wot we ern (Gerald Benan)
27. wife=yung mistres, middel aej kompanyun, old aej ners (Fransis Bakon, 1600)
28. yu die av old aej. If yu luv, yu die yung (Arthur W Pinero, 1930)
29. yu thank it bad that lust & rage ruel mi old aej?
so it was wen me was yung (Will B Yeets)
30. yueth blunder, man struggel, old aej regret (Ben Disraeli)
1429. old maid...
1. if theer's an old maid in the hous, yu dont need a watch dog (Honor deBalzak)
2. old maid is like deth bi drown...delitful if yu dont fite it (Edna Ferber)
3. old maids R trubel (Tom Nelsun)
4. old maids sweeten theer tee with skandal (Josh Billings)
5. prudens is a rich ugly old maid (Will Blake)
6. she wood hav ben remarkabel, but shes an old maid (Tom Nelsun)
1430. old soldjers never die...
1. old actuarees never die, em just brake down bi aej & sex
2. old advencher games never die, em just get a nu faeslist
3. old aerplanes never die, em just wate in pugatory
4. old akademiks never die, em just luze theer fakultees
5. old akkountants never die, em just luze theer balans.
6. old akkounts never die, em are deleted
7. old akters never die, em just drop apart.
8. old alkoholiks never die, em just luze theer spirits.
9. old anesthesiologists never die, em just run outta gas
old soldyers never die
10. old antelope breeders never die, em just start gnu
11. old anthropologists never die, em just bekum histree
12. old appel puters never die, em just fade intu the shadoes
13. old archers never die, em just bo and quiver.
14. old architekts never die, em just luze theer structures.
15. old assets never die, em just depresheate
assets never die, em R transferred tu waestrals hu sqander em
16. old astronauts never die, em just gotu nuther werld
17. old atoms never die, em just dekae
**
18. old baloonist never die, em just go hier & hier
19. old bankers never die, em just luze interest.
bankers never die, em just want tu be a lone
old soldyers never die
20. old baseballs never die, em just get pitched
21. old baseball plaers never die, em just go batty
baseball plaers never die, em just run theer last lap
baseball plaers never die, but oft theer memrees lie
22. old basketball plaers never die, em just go on dribbling.
23. old beekeepers never die, em just buzz off.
24. old bikers never die, but R hard on tires
25. old biologists never die, em just ferment awae
26. old biz never die, em just get konsolidated
27. old bloggers never fade, em just get archived
28. old blondes never fade, em just die awae
29. old boelers never die, em just end up in the gutter
old soldjers never die
30. old bookkeepers never die, em just luze theer figgers.
31. old books never die, em just go out-of-print
books never die, em mate at nite weer yu kant katch em
32. old bosses never die, much as yu want em tu.
33. old botanist never die, em just wither awae.
34. old brakes never die, em just grind down
35. old bredmen never die, em just luze theer do
36. old bridge plaers never die, em just luze theer finesse
bridge plaers never die, em just sit around on theer fat akes
37. old briklaers never die, em just bekum mortarfied
briklaers never die, em just thro in the towel
38. old budgets never die, em are fillibustered
39. old burglars never die, em just steel awae
old soldjers never die
40. old burokrats never die, em just waste awae
**
41. old casheers never die, em just chek out.
42. old CD-ROMs never die, em just bekum nonreedabel
43. old chauffeurs never die, em just luze theer drive.
44. old chickens never die, em just get fried
45. old childbirth koech never die, em just laber awae
46. old chineez kooks never die, em just wok awae
**
47. old dairymen never die, em just get butter & butter
48. old dansers never die, em just step awae
49. old daredevils never die, em just get diskeraged
old soldjers never die
50. old deens never die, em just luze theer fakulties
51. old dentists never die, em just luze theer pull
dentists never die, em just look down in the mouth
52. old dieters never die, em just waest awae
53. old divers never die, em just extend theer bottom time
divers never die, em just flop
divers never die, em just get boerd
divers never die, em just luze theer spring
54. old dokters never die, em just luze theer paesens
55. old drivers never die, em just blo a gasket
56. old drug addikts never die, em just get wasted
57. old drummers never die, em just roll awae (drum roll)
**
58. old editers never die, em duit with a red pen
59. old Egyptian tuerists never die, em just se-nile
old soldjers never die
60. old elektreshuns never die, em just luze kontakt.
elektreshuns never die, em just duit til it siekel
elektreshuns never die, em just switch off
61. old elektrikal engineers never die,em just hav sloer rise times
62. old energizer bunnies never die, em go on, and on, and on...
63. old engineers never die, em just luze theer beerings.
64. old english majers duit with strunk and wite
65. old english teechers never die, em just kompleet theer sentens
66. old environmentalists never die, em R just resiekeled
67. old eskimoes never die, em just get kold feet
eskimoes never die, em just go kold
68. old exorsists never die, em just giv up the goest
**
69. old farmers never die, em just luze theer beerings.
farmers never die, em just gotu seed
farmers never die, em just spade awae
old soldjers never die
70. old fathers never die, em just bekum grandfathers
71. old firefiters never die, em just gotu blazes
72. old fireflies never die, em just glo on
73. old fishermen never die, em just smell like it
fishermen never die, theer rods just go limp
fishermen never die, em just get reel tired
fishermen never die, em just smell that wae
74. old fiters never die, em just luze theer punch
75. old fones never die, em just stop ringing
76. old football plaers never die, em just gotu the end zone
77. footballers never die, em just kik the bukket
78. old foresters never die, em just pine awae
79. old forjers never die, and em leev no traeses
old soldjers never die
80. old freends never die, and never kall eether
81. old fridge repaermen never die, em just blo theer kuel
82. old frogs never die, em just kroek
83. old fruet never die, it just peer-ish
84. old fullbaks never die, it just kik off
**
85. old gamers never die, em just babbel in the korner
gamers never die, em just bekum histree
gamers never die, em just dies with deth
gamers never die, em just enter a netherwerld
gamers weer theer is time tu plae til yu drop
gamers never die, em just get bord
gamers never die, em just get plaed out
gamers never die, em just luze theer balans
86. old gangsters never die, em just fade intu the nite
gangsters never die, just like Al Kapone
87. old garagemen never die, em just fall off theer bloks
garagemen never die, em just retire.
88. old gardeners never die, em just vegetate
gardeners never die, em just push up daezees
gardeners never die, em just spade awae
89. old geologists never die, em just petrify
geologists never die, em just rekrystalize
old soldyers never die
90. old glass never die, it just get smashed
91. old gods never die, em abide
92. old goest towns never die, em bekum desolate
93. old golfers never die, em just keep putting along
golfers never die, em just luze theer balls
golfers never die, em just luze theer drive
94. old grafik artists never die, em just de-rez
95. old guvt werkers never die, but hu kan tell (hu notis, hu see the diff)
**
96. old habbits never die, em just lae around like old sleeping dog
97. old hakkers never die, em just gotu bits.
98. old hams never die, em just get grounded
99. old hardware enjineers never die,em just cash in theer chips.
old soldyers never die
100. old helsinki tuerists never die, em just disappeer intu finn air
101. old hikers never die, em just get the boot
hikers never die, em just trael awae
102. old hipochondreaks never die, em just imajin it
hipochondreaks never die, em just luze theer grip [French for flu]
103. old hippies never die, em just smell that wae
104. old hoexes never die, the more thangs chaenj,
the more em stae the same
105. old hokkey plaers never die, em just get theer last goel
106. old homebruers never die, em just ferment awae
107. old hoookers never die, em just get laed off
108. old hortikulturists never die, em just gotu pot.
109. old hunters never die, em just stae loeded
**
old soldyers never die
110. old immortals [vampires] never die, em just...dont
111. old interpreters (for def) never die, em just sine off
112. old investers never die, em just roll over.
113. old italians never die, em just pasta wae.
**
114. old janiters never die, em just get sweeped up.
115. old jernalists never die, em just get de-pressed.
116. old jimnists never die, em just take longer tu mount
117. old jokes never die, em just get retold
jokes never die, em just pass on tu the next jenerashun
118. old judjes never die, em just slur theer sentenses
**
119. old kampane issues never die, em just get twisted intu more krooked form
old soldyers never die
120. old kampane slogans never die, em just get rejiggered
121. old kanners never die, em are preserved
122. old kars never die, em just get run intu the ground
123. old kasheers never die, em just chek out
124. old kee punch operaters never die,em just punch out
125. old kemists never die, em just duit nonorgaik
kemists never die, em just fael tu reakt.
kemists never die, em just luze theer reflux
kemists never die, em just reech equilibrium
kemists never die, em just smell that wae
126. old kereers never die, em just keep on expressing it
127. old kids never die, em just adulterate
. kids never die, em just gro up
128. old kings never die, em just get throned awae
129. old kleening folks never die, em just go down the tubes (down the draen)
kleening folks never die, em just kik the bukket.
old soldyers never die
130. old kleptomaniaks never die, em just kant help it
kleptomaniaks never die, em just steel awae
131. old kommunists never die, em just chaenj theer stripes
kommees
132. old komposers never die, em just dekompose
133. old komputer folks never die, em just luze theer memree
134. old komputer nerds never die, em just bekum Iran watelifting koeches
135. old komputer programers never die,em just bite the dust
136. old kongressmen never die, em just bekum lobbyists
137. old kooks never die, em just get deranged.
138. old kops never die, em just kop out.
139. old kopy editers never die, em just kall intu a komma
old soldyers never die
140. old kowboys never die, em R deranged
141. old kredit cards never die, em just die [expire in krat speek]
142. old kriketers never die, em just get boeled over
kriketers never die, em just get smashed for 6
143. old kuepon klippers never die, em just expire
**
144. old landskapers never die, em just get weeded out
145. old laser fizists never die, em just bekum nonkoherent.
146. old lawyers never die, em just luze theer appeel.
lawyers never die, em just luze theer briefs
147. old lepers never die, em just fall apart
148. old limbo dansers never die, em just go under.
149. old librarians never die, em just chek out
librarians never die, em just get re-shelved
librarians never die, em just kloes the book
librarians never die, em just luze theer referenses
librarians never die, theer komputers hav fatal errers
old soldyers never die
150. old librarians av rare books never die, em bekun ex-libras.
em bekun dis-bound.
em bekun nonperfekt
em bekun goest edishuns
em chaenj quires.
em get bound at et infra.
em get inlaed.
151. old linguists never die, em just rearrange theer deep structures
152. old lite bulbs never die, em just blink out
153. old lobbyists never die, em just get rich
154. old lo-eriders never die, em just ride loer
as em ride off intu the sunset
155. old maeds kount on fingers, yung girls kount on legs
156. old maelmen never die, em just luze theer zip
157. old maenframes never die, em just xpeerens nu reinkarnashuns
158. old magnets never die, em just luze theer koils
159. old majikians never die, em just chaenj koler
majikians never die, em just disapeer
majikians never die, em just floet awae
majikians never die, em just fool self
majikians never die, em just make a big producshun of it
old soldyers never die
160. old math teechers never die, em just redues tu loest terms
161. old mathematishuns never die, em just disintegrate
mathematishuns never die, em just go off on a tangent
mathematishuns never die, em just luze funkshuns
162. old mediums never die, em just visit theer freends
163. old mekaniks never die, em just retire
mekaniks never die, em R so lubed, em slip awae
164. old mersenarees never die, em find sumwon els tu take theer plaes
mersenarees never die, em just gotu hell tu regruep
165. old meteors never die, em just bern up
metriks never die, em just die off from neglekt
166. old metriks never die, em just kut the feed-bak loop
167. old milkmaeds never die, em just luze theer wae. [whey in krat speek]
168. old ministers never die, em just get put out tu paster....
ministers never die, em just go out tu paster
169. old miths never die, em just sorta fade awae
old soldyers never die
170. old mp's never die, em just attaen peerage
171. old mufflers never die, em just get exhausted
172. old muzikans never die, em just decompose
muzikans never die, em just get plaeed out.
muzikans never die, em just go from bar tu bar
**
173. old net start-ups never die, em just bekum alumni klubs
174. old nites in chaen mael never die, em just shuffle off theer metal koils.
175. old nitpikkers never die, em just feel ded
176. old nuclear power plants never die,em just go off-line
177. old number theerists never die, em just get past theer prime.
178. old numerical analysts never die,em just get disarrayed
179. old owls never die, em just dont giv a hoot.
old soldyers never die
**
180. old paenter never die, em just get plastered
181. old pasafists never die, em just gotu peeses.
182. old paradoxes never die, em just bekum enigmas
183. old penguins never die, em just bekum hard av herrings
184. old personnel agents never die, em just get hire & hire
185. old pig breeders never die, em just get disgrunteled
186. old pik takers never die, em get sent tu the old fokus home
pik takers never die, em just stop developing
187. old pilots never die, em just buzz off
pilots never die, em just gotu a hier plane
188. old planets never die, em just gravatate tugether
planets never die, em just luze theer attrakshun
189. old plastic never die, em just resikel it
old soldyers never die
190. old plumbers never die, em just go down the draen
191. old politishuns never die, em just run 1 time 2 many
politishuns never die, em just tern intu korp bord members
192. old posts never die, em just liv forever on the internet
193. old preechers never die, em just rambel on, and on, and on, and on....
preechers just luze theer wind
194. old printers never die, em R just not the tipe
195. old produesers never die, em just chaenj the ending
196. old produkts never die, but shood
197. old professers never die, em just luze theer klass.
198. old programers never die, em just bekum nonmanagers
programers never die, em just bite the big 1
programers never die, em just bite the dust
programers never die, em just branch tu a nu address.
programers never die, em just decompile
programers never die, em just get bugged with life
programers never die, em just gotu bits
programers never die, em just kant "C" as good
programers never die, em just luze it bit bi bit
programers never die, em just luze theer memree
programers never die, em just muve tu nu addres
programers never die, em just reassembel in a diff life form
programers never die, em just terminate & stae resident
programers never die, theer puter had a fatal errer
199. old programming wizards never die,em just rekers
old soldyers never die
200. old propane tanks never die, em just run outta gas
201. old prositutes never die, em just fake awae...
202. old punkts never die, em just engage in endless lawsuits
203. old punters never die, em just go herse
204. old puters never die, em just kost kollejes munee in nu waes
**
205. old quarry werkers never die, em just get blasted
206. old quarterbaks never die, em just pass awae.
quarterbaks never die, em just fade bak and pass awae
207. old quilters never die, em just gotu peeses
quilters never die, em just go under kuver
**
208. old radios never die, em just stop reseeving
209. old raelroeders never die, em just derael
old soldyers never die
210. old raen puddles never die, em just dri up
211. old rokkers s never die, but em get sik
**
212. old saelers never die, em just get a little dingy.
saelers never die, em just get the drift
saelers never die, em just keel over
saelers never die, em just luze theer purpus
213. old salesmen never die, em just go outta kommisshun
214. old sanders never die, em just luze theer grit
215. old seemstres never die, em just kum tu the point
216. old seers never die, em just luze theer vishun.
217. old sewer werkers never die, em just waest awae
218. old sheetrokkers (dri wall) never die, em just hang around
219. old shefs never die, em just gotu theer yuze-bi date
old soldyers never die
220. old shues makers never die, em just luze theer sole
221. old singers never die, em just sael tu Byzantium
222. old skandels never die, em multipli
223. old ske-ers never die, but em go downhill fast
ske-ers never die, em just go over the hill
224. old skeptiks never die, dont no weer em go but theer fyucher is dismal
225. old skots never die, but em kan be kilt
226. old skuels never die, em just luze theer prinsapals.
227. old skulpters never die, em just luze theer marbels.
228. old snak venders never die, em just kash in theer chips
229. old soep stars never die, em just tern pathetik
old soldyers never die
230. old sokker plaeers never die, em just get theer last goel
sokker plaeers never die, em just luze theer kik
231. old soldyers dont die, em faed awae (Doug McArthur)
soldyers dont die, yung wons die
soldyers never die, em just smell that wae
232. old sourdoes never die, em just ferment awae
233. old spelunkers never die, em just kave in
234. old statistishuns never die, em just brake down bi aej and sex
235. old steelmakers never die, em just luze theer temper
236. old students never die, em just degrade
237. old surfers never die, em just get wiped out
238. old swimmers never die, em just fall off theer bloks
swimmers never die, em just hav a stroke
swimmers never die, em just kik off the bloks
239. old system programmers never die, em just chdir tu null
old soldyers never die
240. old systems never die, em just aej us tu deth's door
**
241. old taelers never die, em just luze theer shirt
242. old tanners never die, em just go intu hiding
243. old teechers never die, em just luze theer klas
teechers never die, em just wipe the slate kleen
244. old thermodynamists never die, em just retern tu max entropy
245. old thermometers never die, em just de-sentigrade
246. old tipest never die, em just luze theer justifikashun
247. old trashmen never die, em R just down in the dumps
248. old tree serjuns never die, em just pine awae
249. old trig teechers never die, em just luze theer identitee
old soldyers never die
250. old tubes never die, em just get punchered
251. old TV shoes never die, em just tern intu feecher films
TV shoes never die, em resurekt as muvees & kommershals
TV shoes never die, em just tern intu feecher films
**
252. old undertalers never die, em just vault awae
253. old upholsters never die, em just rekuver
**
254. old vakashuners never die, em just never kum bak
255. old violin plaers never die, em just bekum unstrung
256. old virjuns never die, em just kum inside
**
257. old Walt Disnee didnt die, he's in suspended animashun
258. old wants never die, em bekum needs
259. old watch makers never die, em just run outta time
watch makers never die, em just wind down
old soldyers never die
260. old wethermen never die, em raen forever
261. old wool koets never die, em just get mothballed
262. old wrestlers never die, em just luze theer grip
**
263. old x-rae teks never die, em just barium
**
264. old yawtzmen never die, em just keel over
old soldyers never die
1431. yuno yer getting old...
1. 3 waes tu tell if yer getting old:
1. lost memree, 2... (I forget), 3 wot was zat?
2. 5am is wen yu get up, not wen yu gotu bed
3. 30 yeer morgage sound like a klever skam
4. 90% av time on puter is reel werk, not plae games
5. all yu want for yer birthdae is tu not be reminded av yer aej
6. arm is not long nuff tu reed nuzpaper
7. bartender dont chek yer id, chek yer puls insted
8. caushun is the oenlee thang yu exersize
9. DeSoto, Hudson, LaSalle, Rambler, Studebaker...yu remember all av em
yer getting old
10. dial a long-distant number weer yu out
11. dont giv a hoot bout latest fad, stile, wots in, wots popular, hu did wot tu hu
12. druggist is yer best freend
13. evreethang weer out, fall out, fall off, buldj, or sag
14. evreetime yu thank av exersize, yu take a nap til it pass
15. freends ask weer yu hert, not how yu feel
16. freends wed or divors, not "hook up" or "brake up"
17. fridj hav more food than beer
18. fun is a lot more werk & werk is less fun
19. "get lukky"...yu find yer kar in the parking lot on the first tri
yer getting old
20. half the stuff in yer shoppin kart sae "for fast releef"
21. happy our is nap time
22. it look kold outside, so yu take a sweter or koet, maby even gluves
23. it take longer tu rest than wot got yu tired
24. it take several tries tu get up from kouch/eezee chaer
25. more haer gro outta yer eers than on top av yer hed
26. nuthang left tu lern the hard wae
27. rokking chaer seem like roller koester
28. sex in a singel bed is outta the quesshun
29. store klerk giv yu the seenyer diskount without yu need tu ask
yer getting old
30. the dokter insted av the kops tell yu tu slo down
31. the fun thang tu du is squish bugs with yer finger
32. the gleem in yer ie is the sun off the bifokals
33. the grae-haered littel old woman yu help kross the street is yer wife
34. the kop that stopped yu shake his hed, but dont giv yu a tiket
35. the medisen kabinet is not big nuff
36. the oenlee klub yu wanna gotu is wife's book klub
37. the oenlee time yu kik up yer heels is wen yu fall down & kant get up
38. the parts av yer body that dont hert dont werk
b. evreethang hert & wot dont hert dont werk
39. the wildest stunt yu pull oenlee kauz the kops tu shrug it off
yer getting old
40. wen a teenaejer walk bi with a boom box, yu wanna smak him
41. wen all yu want for yer birthdae is tu not be reminded how old yu R
42. wen best part av dae is over wen alarm klok ring
43. wen dokter is same aej as yer grandsun
44. wen evree kar pass yu
45. wen freends sae how yung yu look, yer getting old (Mark Twain)
46. wen it take all nite tu du wot yu yuzed tu du all nite
47. wen TV kommershals R funneeer than the program
48. wen yu get up in the morn, yu wunder "wot shood I du tudae?"
49. wen yu go intu room & kant remember wi
yer getting old
50. wen yu kall evreewon "kid" or "sonny"
51. wen yu sleep, others wunder if yer ded
52. yer baddest enemee is gravity
53. yer bak go out more than yu
b. yer bak go out but yu stae home
54. yer body sound like the koffee maker
55. yer dokter start with "konsidering yer aej..."
56. yer favorit spot in nuzpaper is "50-yeers ago tudae"
57. yer freend date sumwon 1/3 his aej & its ok
58. yer get-up-&-go got up & went
59. yer getting old wen the kandels kost more than the kake (Bob Hope)
yer getting old
60. yer hot flashes set off the smoke alarm
61. yer idea av a nite out is tu sit on the porch
62. yer idea av wate-lifting is tu stand up
63. yer joints R more akkurat than the wether servis
64. yer kids ask yu bout the old daes & yu tell em
65. yer kids bi yu a t-shirt that sae "old fart"
66. yer kids kall yu ma & pa (or mom & pop)
67. yer littel blak book oenlee hav names that start with dr or MD
68. yer lost at the Oskars kauz yu dont no the akters or the muvees
69. yer memree is shorter, yer komplaents longer & louder
yer getting old
70. yer nees bukkel but yer belt dont
71. yer old klothes R bak in stile
72. yer paesmaker make the garage door open wen yu see a pretty girl
73. yer pants...waest is longer than the legs
74. yer "party til dawn" peter out at 10pm
75. yer preferred drug is now vitamins
76. yer sekrets R safe with freends kauz em kant remember em eether
77. yer traen-av-thot deraels a lot
78. yer yung at hart, old elsweer
79. yu & yer teeth dont sleep tugether
yer getting old
80. yu bern the midnite oil til 9 pm
81. yu bi thangs for konfort & yuzeability, not looks
82. yu brake wen the trafik lite tern yello
83. yu chaes wemen but dont remember wi
84. yu dont kare hu is #1 at wotever
85. yu dont kare weer wife go as long as yu dont hafta go 2
86. yu dont remember being absent-minded
87. yu dont remember wot yu sed 10 minuts ago, or if yu sed it
88. yu dont look forward tu yer next birthdae
89. yu drive along & dont no weer yer going. Dont matter, no hurry.
yer getting old
90. yu eet sereal for brakefast insted av snak it outta the box watching TV
91. yu fall asleep at x-rated muvee
92. yu feel like the morn after but did not hav the nite b4
93. yu find self standing in line & dont remember wi
94. yu get a fone kall at 9pm & him ask "did I wake yu?"
95. yu get outta bed in the morn, even if its raening
96. yu get tu the top av the ladder & find its the rong wall
97. yu get winded plaeing ches
98. yu get yer mind tugether but the body fall apart
99. yu giv up all bad habits, but still dont feel good
yer getting old
100. yu go from long haer tu longing for haer
101. yu gossip bout sumwon's operashun & luv it
102. yu hav a party and the nabers dont notis
103. yu hav munee tu bern, but the fire is out
104. yu heer yer favorit song in the elevater
105. yu hope on yer next birthdae yu will get sumthang yuzeful like sox
106. yu install a kompas on the dash av the kar
107. yu kall the kops kauz the naber wont tern down the stereeo
108. yu kan liv without sex but not without glasses
109. yu kant smoke the hous plants NE-more
yer getting old
110. yu keep repeeting yerself, repeeting, repeeting,....
111. yu kleen yer teeth in the dishwasher
112. yu look for yer glasses a half our B4 yu relize yu hav em on
113. yu look forward tu a dull evening
114. yu muve bed kloeser tu bathroom kauz yu spend half the nite theer
115. yu need a push tu klimb outta a kar kauz the seet is so lo
116. yuno all the ansers but nowon ask yu
117. yuno all the oldees stashuns in town
118. yuno yer groed up kauz yu groen evreetime yu get up
119. yu no longer konsider the speed limit a challenj
yer getting old
120. yu no longer tri tu suk-in the belly no mater hu kum intu the room
121. yu notis yer kids R middel-aejed
122. yu pass Viktorias Stashun & dont look
123. yu reech the metal aej...silver haer, gold teeth, led butt
124. yu reed the ded list in the nuzpaper tu see if yer theer
125. yu reeched the sexpirashun date
126. yu regret all the times yu resisted temptashun
127. yu remember...if it had a ring in the nose, its a pigmee in the Kongo
128. yu remember a nikkel kood bi 10 owns kandy bar
129. yu remember Big Cheef paper tablet
yer getting old
130. yu remember wen a box av kraeons had 8 kolers
131. yu remember wen a milkshake kame with 2 straws
132. yu remember wen a room at motel 6 kost 6$
133. yu remember wen fone kall kost 5 sents
134. yu remember wen "gae" ment...happy, fun, joy, lite-harted
135. yu remember wen koke bottels had the name & town weer em was botteled
136. yu remember wen Mitsubishi oenlee made war planes
137. yu remember wen nuzpaper kost 5 sents
138. yu remember wen sales klerk sed "kum agin" insted av "hav a nies dae"
139. yu remember wen store klerks did not hav rings in theer:
nose, iebrow, lips, tung, belly-button
yer getting old
140. yu remember wen tooth faeree left a nikkel
141. yu remember wot yu did 30 yeers ago but kant remember 30 minuts ago
142. yu remember yer old skuel desk had inkwell with a bottel av reel ink
143. yu run outta breth wen yu go DOWN the staers
144. yu seed it all, did it all, but dont remember the detaels
145. yu sink yer teeth intu a stake & em stae theer
146. yu sit in a rokking chaer but kant make it go
147. yu start most sentenses with "nowadaes"
148. yu still hav it, but nowon wanna see it
149. yu stop groing at the ends but still gro round the middel
yer getting old
150. yu stop in the middel av the staers & dont no if yer going up or down
151. yu take an umbrella wen it look like raen
152. yu take naps morn & afternoon
153. yu take pills tu help yer memree so yukan remember the other pills
154. yu tell stranjers how much gas yuzed tu kost (25 sents)
155. yu tend tu repeet self, repeet self, repeet....
156. yu tern off lites tu save munee
157. yu tern on TV & take a nap
158. yu wake up looking like yer pik on the driving lisens
159. yu watch the wether channel
yer getting old
160. yu water the hous plants evree dae
161. yu weer hawaiian shirt, shorts, sandels, & blak soks
162. yu wons had a kar with running bords
163. yu worry bout wot the next jenerashun is kuming tu
164. yu wunder how yu kan be over the hill without ever get tu the top
165. yung men ask yu for advise
1432. older than father time
1433. olivebranch=sine av pees (peace in krat speek)
1434. on...
1. on a byuteful dae, its grate tu be alive
2. on a shuestring=very littel munee
3 on a wing and a praeer=hopeful but littel hope (Harold Adamsun, 1943)
4 on kloud 9=happy
5. on matters av prinsapal, stand like a rok (Tom Jeffersun)
6. on the ball=alert, redee, efishent
7. on the bredline=very poor
8. on the grapevine=ruemer, gossip, kum outside "ofishal" channel
9. on the horns av a dalimma=oenlee 2 choises & both R bad
10. on the QT's=add ies kubes tu yer drink
11. on the roks
12. on the rong trak=go rong wae, yu will never get weer yu wanna go
13. on the sholders av a giant
14. on the skids=down, bad
15. on the slate=on the list av thangs tu du
16. on the spur av the moment=jump in, rush in
17. on the wagon=stop a bad habit (til yu fall off the wagon)
sum thank it kame from old daes wen hoer-drawed wagons delivered water.
18. on the warpath=mad, aggressiv
19. on tinderhooks=tenshun, suspens, anxiety
20. on yer hi-hoers=arrogant
1435. oner... (honor in krat speek)
1. deer man hold oner more preshus than life (Shakespeer)
2. deliquent hav sex with yer oner student
3. I'll defend her oner, thats more than her ever did
4. oner is gooder than oners
5. oner the valient, kill the ambishus (Shakespeer)
6. shuer wae tu oner is tu be wot yu pretend tu be (Sokrates)
1436. onest... ("honesty" in superkrat)
1. all the onestee in the werld wont get yu 1 loef av bred (Josh Billings)
2. an onest man is the nobel werk av god (Alexander Pope)
3. be onest and theer is 1 less raskal in the werld (Tom Karliel)
4. how tu find out if a man is onest...
ask him. If him sae "yes", hees a krook (Groucho Marx)
5. hu lie for yu, will lie ginst yu (Bosnia)
6. if yu tell the truth, yu dont hafta remember wot yu sed (Mark Twaen)
7. man is not truthful. Giv him a mask if yu want truth (Oskar Wild)
8. onest tale go best if told plaen (Shakespeer, Henvree 6)
9. onestee dont pae nuff for most folks (Kin Hubbard)
10. onestee is the best polisee (Richard Watelee)
11. onestee is the best polisee. Insane is best defens (Steev Landesberg)
12. onestee is the first chapter in the book av wisdum (Tom Jeffersun)
13. onestee never sit on a fens (Lemuel K Washbern, 1911)
14. truth with bad intent beet all lies yu invent (Will Blake)
15. yu wood lie if in his plaes (Henree Menken, 1916)
16. yuze wite lies & yu suen bekum koler-blind (Austin O'Mallee)
1437. onree... (onery in krat speek)
1. onree ass a fried toed
1438. open mind
1. I yuzed tu hav a open mind, but mi braens fellout
1438. open sesame=passwerd, kode werd...from story bout Ali-baba & the 40 theefs (1750)
1439. opera... (opra in non-krat)
1. bed=poor mans opera (Italy)
2. opera...gi get stabbed in bak, then sing for 1 hr (Robert Benchlee)
3. sleep is a grate wae tu heer an opera
4. The opera iz not over til the fat brod sing (Dan Kook)
1440. operashun...
1. miner operashun...em duit on sumwon els
2. operashun was a sukses, but unfortunatelee the paeshent died
1441. others kalamitee sho yu wot tu avoid (Bublilus Syrus)
1442. our...
1. our body is our garden, our will is the gardener (Shakespeer)
2. our kritiks R our best freends (Ben Franklin)
3. ours not tu reesunwi=dont quesshun orders
1443. open...
1. I yuzed tu hav an open mind, but mi braens fell out
2. open mouth, insert foot
1444. opportunitee... ("opportunity" in superkrat)
1. ability dont kount without opportunitee (Napoleon)
2. alwaes hav yer hook baeted & ina pool (Ovid, 3bc)
3. dont slam the door, yu mite wanna go thru it agin (Don Herod)
4. doors dont slam open (Jon M Shanahan)
5. far more opportunity than ability (Tom A Edisun, 1880)
6. forchun nok 1 time. Misforchun hav much more paeshens (Lawens Peter)
7. got the werld at his feet & kant find his shues (Jon Williansun)
8. hard tu tell apart...hard noks & opportunitee (Fred Filips)
9. I heered opportunitee at the door. But I had tu unlok 3 loks,
pull bak 2 bolts, unlook the chaen, tern off buglar alarm
tie up dog, shutoff TV, getoff sell fone...
opportunity
10. I seldum see opportunitee til it no longer is (Mark Twaen)
11. if opportunitee dont nok, bild a door (Milton Berl)
12. if yu make a gooder mous trap,
the werld will beet a path tu yer door (Ralf W Emersun, 1845)
13. if yu thank onit, yu luze it (Publilus Syrus, 100ad)
14. kids plae with sand & let it slip thru theer fingers
many adults duit with opportunitee (Tom Jones)
15. look for opportunitee? Its dressed in werk klothes
15. make yer opportunitee (Jon B Gough, 1840)
16. manee miss opportunitee kauz
it dress in werk garb & look like werk (Tom A Edisun)
17. most dont reknize opportunitee kauz its not on a billbord (Will A Ward)
18. nok on doors til em open
19. oenlee time werld beet path tu yer door is wen yer in the bathroom
opportunity
20. open evree door (Emilee Dikensun, 1860)
21. opportunitee...eezeer tu see going than kuming
22. opportunitee & danjer go tugether (Erl Nitengale, 1950)
23. opportunitee alwaes nok at the baddest time
24. opportunitee is in middel av diffikultee (Albert Einstein)
25. opportunitee is tween tumorro's dreem & yesterdae's regret
26. opportunitee kum as problems tu solv (Lee Iakoka)
27. opportunitee kum but dont stae long (Nepal)
28. opportunitee kum disgised as hard werk, most dont rekonize it (An Landers)
29. opportunitee kum from adversaree (Ben Franklin)
opportunity
30. opportunitee look gooder going than kummin
31. opportunitee nok 1 time. Temptashun leen on the doorbell
32. plow deep wile sluggards sleep (Ben Franklin)
33. problem=opportunitee + thorns (HU Miller)
34. problem=opportunitee in werk klothes (Henree Kaiser, 1940)
35. prokrastinate kill opportunitee
36. rite man seez the moment (Jon Goethe, 1775)
37. seez it with both hands & make the most av it (Al Kapone, 1925)
38. small opportunity start big interpries (Demothenes, 340bc)
39. sumwon will take the opportunitees yu miss
opportunity
40. the bak av a door is the faes tu the other side
41. the harder the problem, the bigger th challenj (Graes Speer)
42. the meens tu du bad deeds make deeds dun bad (Shakespeer)
43. the sine on the door sae push
44. we open a book, paejes blank. We put werds init. Book is opportunity.
chapter 1=nu yeers dae (Edith L Peers, 1930)
45. wen 1 door kloes, nuther open (Don Quihotee)
46. wen em R konfuzed, theer is opportunitee
47. wen flowers bluem, bees kum (Rava Krishna)
48. wen the door tu opportunity open, dont ignore it (Jessee Jaksun)
49. wise man make his opportunitee (Fransis Bakon, 1625)
b. make more opportunitees than him find
1445. opposit...
1. evree sweet hav its sour, evree evil its good (Ralf W Emersun, 1850)
2. opposits attrakt
3. the werld is dark & lite, good & evil, null & matter
1446. oppres...
1. histree av the oppressed is rited bi the oppressers (Meridel Sueur)
2. if yu hold down 1 yu hold down all (Sam Bello)
3. many dont like oppresshun but like tu oppres (Napoleon, 1800)
4. oppresshun is war (Simon Bovoir, 1950)
5. The fyucher...a boot stamping on a faes forever (Jorj Orwell, 1935)
6. The kuntree is kalm. Kalm as a moerg or a grave (Vaklav Havel)
7. The need tu dominate is a hungree beest (Andrea Duorkin)
8. weer justis is denied nuthang is safe (Fred Douglas, 1840)
1447. optimist... (optimism in krat speek)
1. a man av 40 hu iz a pesimist, no tu much
if him be a optimist, him no tu littel (Mark Twain)
2. alwaes borro from a pesimist...him dont spekt it bak Ne-wae
3. averaej pensil is 7 inch with 1/4 inch eraser.
Talk bout optimistik (Robert Brault)
4. be optimistik, yu kan kri later (Lucimar S Lima)
5. get fired=midlife vokashun reasess (P J O'Rourk)
6. dont be 2 optimistik...the lite at the end av the tunnel mae be a train kummin
7. I am an optimist. No sens otherwise (W Churchil)
8. I beleev man will prevael (Will Faulkner, 1930)
9. no sadder site than yung pessimist (Mark Twaen)
optimist
10. oenlee thang sadder than yung optimist is old optimist (Mark Twain)
11. optimism is the drug av komman man (Milan Kundera)
12. optimist...a man hu thank him kan teech wife how tu drive
13. optimist...his pokket full av munee, dijesshun good, wife awae (Helen Roeland)
14. optimist= man without xpeereens (Don Marquis, 1910)
15. optimist argue blak is wite (Ambrose Beers, 1880)
16. optimist beleev housfli look for a wae out (Jorj Nathan, 1920)
17. optimist beleev the best is yet tu kum (Peter Ustinov)
18. optimist drive a YUGO
29. optimist fell off tall bilding. On wae down him sed "so far, so good"
optimist
20. optimist fluerish in madhous (Hanelok Ellis, 1890)
21. optimist invent aerplane, pessimist the parashuet (Gil Stern)
22. optimist kall bullshit fertilizer (Frank Dane)
23. optimist sae even uglee is byuteeful (Ambrose Beers, 1880)
24. optimist sae we liv in best av all possabel werlds
pessimits feer it is true (James B Kabell, 1926)
25. optimist start nu diet on Thanksgiving (Irv Kupcinet)
26. optimist thank the thin haer on top is a temp problem
27. optimist thank theer will kum a time wen no more jokes bout optimists
28. optimist thank this is the best av all possabel werlds
pessamist noit be (Julius R Oppenheimer, 1940)
29. pessimits...optimist hu tried tu praktis wot him preeched
optimist
30. pessimits...sumwon hu yuzed tu liv with an optimist (Elbert Hubbard, 1927)
31. pessimits is oft rite in the end,
but optimist hav more fun on the wae (Dan L Reerdon)
32. pessimits see dark klouds & mope
filosofer see both sides av kloud & shrug
optimist dont see klouds kauz him walk on em (Leonardo L Levinson)
33. pessimits thank all wemen R bad; optimist hope so (Chaunsee M Depu)
34. plaes with most optimists:
mad hous (lunatik asylum in krat speek) (Havelok Ellis, 1923)
35. setting sun will rise agin (Robert Browning, 1840)
36. sukses kum in kans, faelyuer in kants
37. The nies part av pessimits:
if NE-thang go rite, its a plesant sprize (Jorj F Will)
38. The werld is the best av all possabel werlds (Fransis Bradlee, 1890)
39. we trust sumhow good will kum from it (Alfred Tennyson, 1850)
40. yu gotta be an optimist tu open ies & get outta bed (karl Sandberg, 1905)
1448. optimize...
1. rule 1 av program optimizashun...DONT
1449. optometrist:
1. If yu dont see wot yu look for, yer at the rite plaes
1449. oratory...
1. oratory...make a lot av deep nois from chest & pretend it kum from braen
2. wot orataters lak in depth, em make up in length
1450. order...
1. Englishman form orderlee line av 1 all alone (Jorj Mikes)
2. good order is the foundashun av all good thangs (Edmund Burk, 1760)
3. order hold the state tugether (Jorj Hegel, 1800)
4. order march with hevee foot. disorder run riot (Napoleon, 1790)
5. the yunivers is ordered (Katherine Porter, 1920)
6. wen libertee kill order, hunger for order kill libertee (Will J Durant, 1930)
1451. organik:
1. Wi is organik food inside plastik & foem?
1452. organize...
1. a plaes for evreethang & evreethang in its plaes (Isabel Beeton)
2. organize is the enemee av improvise, or is it the other wae round?
3. the more organized, the less moral (Eduard Forster, 1920)
4. the purpus av lernin is tu lern how tu find stuff
1453. original...
1. a man with a nu idea is a krank unless him sukseed (Mark Twain)
2. a thot mae be original tu yu even tho sed b4 1000 times (Oliver W Holms, 1850)
3. all good thangs was invented (Jon S Mill, 1840)
4. dont expekt original from an ekko
5. evreethang hav ben sed, theer is nuthang nu (Jeen Brufre, 1670)
6. if evreewon was original, we koodnt take it (H L Menken, 1920)
7. men applaud imitashun & hiss the reel thang (Aesop, 600bc)
8. original art is alwaes uglee (klement Greenberg)
9. original riter...nowon kan imitate him (Chateobriand)
10. originality is selektiv plagerism (Voltair, 1725)
11. the more original a diskuvree,
the more obveeus it seem after (Art Koestler, 1930)
1454. ostentashus...
1. ostentashus=hipokrit (Ed H Chapin, 1840)
2. ostentashus want the alms av mi envy
like poor man want mi gilt (Ben Hekt, 1930)
1455. other fish tu fri (Me hav other thangs tu du, other projekts tu werk on)
1456. out...
1. out av adversity kum opportunitte (Ben Franklin)
2. outta the fripan intu the fire=from 1 problem tu nuther (maby badder than b4)
3. out av sorts
4. Out av the jaws av deth
5. Out av the koels and intu the fire
6. Out av the mouths av babes kum all wise saeings
7. Out av the running=not likely tu win
8. out behind the wood shed
9. out like a lite
10. out on a limb=danjer, exposed
11. Out with the old, in with the nu
12. outta site, outta mind
1457. outside...
1. outside evree thin girl is a fat man triing tu get in (Kate Witehorn)
2. outside sho is a poor substitute for inside werth (Aesop, 600bc)
1458. outta... (out av in krat speek)
1. outta debt, outta danjer
2. outta friing pan, intu the fire
3. outta klutter, find simplisittee
diskord, harmonee
problems, opportunittee (Einstein)
4. outta site outta mind
5. outta sorts
6. outta the bag=sumwon found the sekret yu tried tu hide
b. beever outta the bag...embarrised
c. kat outta the bag...kyute
7. outta the koles and intu the fire
8. outta the jaws av deeth (Shakespeer)
9. outta the mouths av babes kum all wise saeings
1459. over...
1. how did I get over-the-hill & never get tu the top?
2. over a barrel=yu kontrol him, yu hav him weer yu want him
3. over the hill...old, tired, week, in yer "deklining" yeers
4. over the top ...win, past the hard part
(British...2 much, exsessiv, over-akt)
5. overstamd...even better than understand
1460. owns... (ounce in krat speek)
1. 1 owns av mother is werth 1 pound av klerjee (Spaen)
2. a owns av cheerful offset a pound av sad (Tom Fuller)
3. a owns av paeshens is werth a pound av braens (Dutch)
4. a owns av praktis is werth a pound av preechin
5. a owns av prevent is werth a pound av fixit (cure in krat speek)
6. better an owns av luk than a pound av gold (Yiddish)
7. disaplin is 1 owns, regret=1 ton (Jim Ron)
1460. oxymoron=werds that kontradikt self
12-owns pound cake
a fine mess
a littel big
akt natural
advansed BASIK
airline food
all natural artifishal flaver
almost exakt
alone in a krowd
alone tugether
apathetik interest
Biz ethics
Definite maby
Diet ies kreem
Exakt estimate
extinkt Life
found missing
jenyuwine imitashun
Good greef
guvt organizashun
Jumbo Shrimp
kidproof
kleer misunderstood
kold Hot Dogs
living ded
military Intelligens
nu York culture
nu klassic
now, then ...
passive aggression
pees foers
plastik glasses
politikal sciens
pretty ugly
puter jok
puter security
same differens
sanitary landfill
self-help gruep
silent skreem
sinthetik natural gas
small krowd
soft rok
software documentashun
sweet sorro
taped live
tax return
terribly pleesed
tite slaks
werking vakashun
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